5PM That’s a Wrap

CSR #1: What does IT stand for?
CSR #2: Idiotic tendencies.
CSR #1: Oh, so that’s why we forward them all the stupid questions.

4800 NW 1st Street
Lincoln, Nebraska

Overheard by: customerserviceslave

Posted on April 19, 2015
Customer Service, Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Nebraska, Words

The Point Is, It Would Make Me Happy If You'd Stop Hitting on Me

Straight guy: And why would I be happy turning gay?
Straight girl: Duh!
Straight guy #2: “Gay” means “happy!”
Straight guy: (silence)
Straight guy #2: “Gay” also means “gay.”
Straight guy: I fail to see your point.

Quorum Drive
Addison, Texas

Posted on April 18, 2015
Friends, Questions, Sexuality, Texas, Words

We Only Sell Fabric That Looks Like Meat

Customer: I need fabric.
CSR: OK. What type of fabric do you need?
Customer: I need fabric.
CSR: Um, could you be more specific?
Customer: I need fabric that looks like cloth.

425 West 15th Street
New York, NY

Posted on April 17, 2015
Customer Service, Dumb Customers, General Idiocy, New York, Offers and requests, Questions, Words

As My Resume States, under “Hobbies”

30-something man: I tend to use the word “fab” a lot.

San Francisco, California

Posted on April 17, 2015
California, Employees, General Idiocy, Words

If I’m Ever Too Old to Chuckle at the Phrase ‘Do It,’ Pull the Plug

Man: It’s OK. We can still do it in my office.
Woman: That sounds fantastic.

Route 9
Wellesley Hills, Massachusetts

Overheard by: twelve step

Posted on April 14, 2015
Coworkers, Massachusetts, Metro Northeast, Sexuality, Words

…I'm a Little Bit Cautious About Dabbling in This Black Magic!

Sales VP on speakerphone to assistant: Can I find a word in an Excel file?
Assistant: Yes, use control + f.
Sales VP: Okay, so control and then hold the f key?
Assistant: Yes.
Sales VP: Oh, okay, that worked!

Manhattan, New York

Posted on April 12, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, New York, Questions, Sales, Technology, Words

What Isn't It?

Caller: Does your search allow for a wild card?
Presenter: Sure … Um … What, exactly, is a wild card?

San Francisco, California

Overheard by: dailin dailer

Posted on April 12, 2015
California, Employees, Questions, Weirdness, Words

The Next Six Months Should Be Fun

Manager: Because your job can be done more efficiently and less expensively overseas, you are being laid off. However, your particular layoff will be delayed for five months because the work you do on your contract cannot be done overseas. Your projected end date will be 10/31.
Employee: Um, please repeat that, and think about it while you do so.
Manager (after repeating): Oh. Um, sorry.

Upstate New York