Wisconsin

Receptionist to coworker: I have the hiccups, so I need some medical advice.

Madison, Wisconsin

Creative director: You're making that up!
HR lady: I am not!
Creative director: Why would you want to be friends with that guy? He wanted to name a flower after you!

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Coworker: If I ate everything that smelled good I would be dead.

Monroe, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Amanda

Woman to group of friends: I just can't get over how my son and daughter have the same initials.

Appleton, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Count Chocula

CEO receptionist: Oh, look! The IT fairy is here with a new PC!
IT guy, carrying computer: Um…?
CEO receptionist: Oh! I meant it like “tooth fairy,” not the…you know, gay kind.
IT guy: Where do you want me to stick it?
CEO receptionist You can put it in the back, the boss is busy right now.

Hospital
Wisconsin

Pretentious boss: Oh, we host different wine tastings all the time. Next month we're having a girlfriend tasting.

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Overheard by: trying hard not to snicker

Frustrated graphic designer: Goddamn Shirley Temple! What the hell?

Glendale, Wisconsin

Overheard by: here too early

Salesperson calling tech support: Let me hang up so I can call back and talk to someone dumber.

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Office philosopher: Short people can't be trusted. Too close to the ground. You know, where the devil is.

Wausau, Wisconsin

Coworker to office pet turtle: You are such a little turd-burglar!

Neenah, Wisconsin

Overheard by: stinky turtle