Washington

Patient to neurologist, exiting examination room: Yes, it really makes you wonder if it's worth it to go on, if you're just going to end up a horrible vampire.

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: so true

Assistant: They’ve already designed the corn maze for a Lewis & Clark theme.
Account executive: Why did they choose Superman?
Assistant: [Stumped silence.]

Thomas Street
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Pants

Fire chief to maintenance worker: I need one with a big bottom, so it doesn't flip over.

Washington State

Over the cube wall: That’s apples and oranges. But the oranges are red.

2nd Avenue
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Murray

(crunching water bottle noise)
Girl admin, in sassy tone: Hey! Those are the breast cancer water bottles–show some respect!
IT guy: Yeah–that's why I'm…
Girl admin: Squishing it?!
IT guy: You said it! Not me!

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: That's what she said

Marcoms manager: The new Bluetooth dongles are here.
VP of operations: Can I have a dongle?
Marcoms manager: You just like saying the word “dongle.”
VP of operations: Actually, I already have a dongle, it's just not a Bluetooth one. (winks)
Marcoms manager: So you can't use it from 33 feet away?
VP of operations: Nope. If I could, that would be like a Tyrannosaurus dongle!

Seattle, Washington

Co-worker #1: Also I watched [Ernest] get into basically a penis-measuring contest with his roommate.
Co-worker #2: Over what?
Co-worker #1: Well…who was the fittest, and about who makes more hourly.
Co-worker #2: Who won?
Co-worker #1: In two weeks they’re going to have a run around Greenlake, and [Anthony] says in a couple of months he’ll make more hourly again.

2001 Lind Avenue SW
Renton, Washington

Coworker, yelling at another walking in: Where are your pants?!

Washington State

Overheard by: I wish i knew

Office lady: Is that one of them giant squids?
PR guy: Yeah.
Office lady: Aren’t those huge?
PR guy: Yep.

Washington State University
Pullman, Washington

Overheard by: Pamela

Minion: Do you seriously want to go off on a Chinese hamster ovary tangent? I mean, who gives a crap?

1959 NE Pacific Street
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: snickerpants