Employee: Bridget’s out on maternity leave again? That woman is fertile!
Boss: Yeah, I know where to come if I want to have more kids.

Bellevue, Washington

Nurse to another: Usually, a parent has lots of children, and they touch all their children and wait for them to go away.

Bellevue, Washington

Shoe store girl #1: You look tired all the time.
Shoe store girl #2: Well, I think it’s my allergies. I’m allergic to cats and I like to rub mine on my face all the time.
Shoe store girl #1: Oh.

Northgate Mall
Seattle, Washington

Attorney: Okay, lay down on your desk.
Paralegal: Okay, but don’t look at my butt.
Attorney, after long pause: Wow, you have an amazing pain tolerance!

Burien, Washington

Overheard by: third wheel

Cubicle worker with a cold: I’ve been sucking on Fisherman’s Friends all day and it’s not helping.

Sedro‐Woolley, Washington

CSR: Okay, and what’s the address?
Customer: 123* A Street.
CSR: Okay, and which street is that on?
Customer: A Street.
CSR: I understand that you live on a street, sir, but I need to know which one.

1001 Roeder Avenue
Bellingham, Washington

Girl #1: Well, you know I like to get kinky.
Girl #2: Oh, I know.
Girl #1: I’ve never had a threesome, but I would do it. I have ground rules, of course, but I’d totally be down for a menagerie.

Andover Park West
Tukwila, Washington

Overheard by: Cat 

Co‐worker #1: All we ever talk about in this office is food. It is
always in the conversation.
Co‐worker #2: Well, it is at every social occasion, and we center our lives around it in a way.
Co‐worker #1: We should all become prostitutes so our conversations
center around our sexual liaisons rather then food.

2601 4th Avenue
Seattle, Washington

Coworker #1: You’re so lucky you get to go home early!
Coworker #2: Nah, I have to go to my mom and dad’s house. I just hope I don’t get MRSA… Or crabs.

Everett, Washington

Manager looking at engineering drawing: Where are my nuts?

Everett, Washington