Sales rep #1: Here’s that spreadsheet. I hid the columns you didn’t need so it would fit on one page.
Sales rep #2: How did you do that? I have been cutting and pasting all this time!
Sales rep #1: Cutting and pasting?
Sales rep #2, pulling out three pieces of paper, cut and taped together to make one big spreadsheet: See? I cut and pasted!
Virginia
Overheard by: What!?
Older lady: Get your filthy hand off me, you son of a whore!
Guy: You comin' back this afternoon?
Older lady: Yeah, I guess. You want me to?
Guy: Yeah, sure.
Older lady: Okay, then. See you later.
Catawba, Virginia
Woman on cell: Well, when I get to my office, I’ll turn on my computer and run through what you did, to see what may be wrong with your computer. [pause] No, Mom, I can’t get onto your computer from my computer.
3301 Fairfax Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Project manger: From now on all of the questions are going to be rhetorical.
Group on speakerphone: [Silence.]Project manager: You know what rhetorical means, don’t you?
Group on speakerphone: [Silence.]Project manager: Anyway…
Fairfax, Virginia
Software Engineer: I’ll like, you know, just pseudocode out this part in the design.
8614 Westwood Center Drive
Vienna, Virginia
Awkward bald man, walking into conference room: Does this work for you?
Obviously lesbian woman meeting with him: Whatever you want, this is all about you.
Awkward bald man: Wow! I wish my wife would say that! She never says anything like that.
Richmond, Virginia
Coworker, testing e-mails: I got a funky one in my junk!
Corporate Park Drive
Herndon, Virginia
IT worker : They’re great for smuggling midgets across the border.
Richmond, Virginia
Female patron in upscale salon: My friends do everything their stylist says to. I’m like, ‘Grow a set, already’!
Springfield, Virginia
Overheard by: James
Business architect: I felt the difference once it was in my mouth!
120 Fairview Park
Virginia
