Strangers

Random stranger: Is that the ATM from upstairs?
Worker, hauling ATM down hallway: Yep.
Random stranger: So now I can't get money upstairs?
Worker: Oh, no. The money's still there in a pile. Just take what you need.

Bethesda, Maryland

Englishman: Can I have a tablespoon, please?
Puzzled waitress: Is that a spoon?

University and 30th Street
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Zombie

Receptionist: Hello. May I help you?
Woman: I would like to apply for a job here.
Receptionist: Why are you leaving your current job?
Woman: Ain’t no movin’ up positions.

220 Dupont Street
Brooklyn, New York

Overheard by: Jack Boston

Automated computer voice on elevator: Second floor. Going down.
Old man: Uh, up yours.

Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: Up it to what?

Distracted sexy woman: I’m in room 7439*.
Bellman: I’m happily married.

Hotel and casino
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Laurence Crews

20-something blonde in crowded elevator: I keep doing weird things with my butt.

New York City, New York

Italian musician in broken English: Excuse… Can you… wash… my instrument?
Agent: What?
Italian roadie: He wants to know if you have a cloth to clean his instrument.
Agent: Oh. Oh. Okay. God, I almost just smacked him!
Italian musician: Wash my instrument now?

Vienna
Austria

Guy in elevator: Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and say, “You have no personal power!”

200 Varick Street
New York, New York

Overheard by: Eve’s droppings

Receptionist, on phone: Ocean View* Escrow
Processor: Darlene* please.
Receptionist: She’s on the other line. Would you like to hold?
Processor: I’d love to.
Receptionist: Really?
Processor: Not big on sarcasm, are you?

1950 Sawtelle Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Matt

40-something guy: So are you working now?
Recent college grad, buying beer: What do you mean?

Mamaroneck, New York

Overheard by: An employee who knows what 'work' means b/c of these people