VP: There is a reason why advertisers do not target user-generated content. They do not want their ads being placed next to naked women. With casual gaming and chess videos, they know what they get. Unless you have nude chess games…and in that case, I need to learn how to play.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Sabotage
Female paralegal: Did you read that article I sent you?
Aussie male coworker: That ain't right.
Female paralegal: Indeed. But 45 minutes! That's longer than most men last.
Aussie male coworker, in long-winded explanation: Well, 45 minutes would be a while for coitus. But remember that the seal wasn't actually getting any. 45 minutes is kinda short if you include foreplay…
Female paralegal: Tsk, tsk…give the seal some credit.
Aussie male coworker: Fine. He has moderate sexual stamina.
Senior paralegal: What?!
Chicago, Illinois
Faculty director, holding out banana: Would you like a banana?
Female program coordinator: Uh, no thanks, I'm all set.
Faculty director, holding out flowers: Well, maybe you'd like these instead!
Female program coordinator: Oh! That's so nice of you! Aw, you're off my bad list.
Faculty director: Wow, and I thought I would get off with just the banana!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Allison
Man #1, discussing peanut usage in Asia: Peanuts are not native to Asia! The peanut was invented by George Washington Carver!
Man #2: That is completely false! You cannot invent a peanut, you can only discover it, and that happened way before George Washington Carver…he invented peanut butter.
Man #1: Listen, I am not a man of pride, but I know this much: George Washington Carver was a good man and he invented the peanut by using cross-breeding! This is what I have been told my whole life!!
Man #3: I'm googling that business right now. (uses BlackBerry) Wow, that man was obsessed with peanuts!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Someone clearly struck a cord with this topic
Evil woman: So I heard this question on the radio this morning: would you rather be fat and someone think you're pregnant, or someone think you are a prostitute? That's just retarded, because you can fix pregnant…and fat. You can't fix prostitute.
St Louis, Missouri
Advisor: You know, her lack of concern for this is really biting me in the ass now. I should have been more aware.
Female grad student: Well, we all should have paid more attention to her work.
Advisor: You know, that's a good point, because trust me: your ass is not protected from biting!
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Accounting guy: I dealt with it when he ran his hand down my leg and up my thigh. But I had to call it quits when he tweaked my nipple. That was a little much.
Santa Monica, California
Older female coworker: So, did you and that guy you had a date with makeout?
Younger female coworker: Um…did we make out?
Older coworker: Yeah. I mean, did you hit it off? What happened with him?
Younger coworker's friend: She doesn't want to talk about it.
Older female coworker: Did he rape you?
Melbourne, Florida
CFO: So, who should we screw today?
Novi, Michigan
Chubby cube-dweller to fit cube-dweller: I'm seriously considering buying a bag of Cadbury Eggs.
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: LiquidChicken
