Office manager: Why is there toilet paper on the floor? Are you a shithead?
Flushing
Queens, New York
Male voice over cubicle: Hey, has Smith gone over to the other side?
Female voice: I don't know, I'll watch his thing and let you know.
Greenville, Texas
Boss to office: What does a robotics team do?
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: stuck in cube neighbor hell
Manager of apartment complex: Does your husband have a crotch rocket?
Rochester, New York
CSR #1: Yeah, I was a vegan for a few years.
CSR #2: What happened?
CSR #1: Chicken happened.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Coworker #1: What should I name my font?
Coworker #2: What about Kont?
Coworker #1: Ew!
Coworker #2: What? Oh, “Kont” sounds like” cunt.”
Coworker #1: That just happened. Gross!
California
Overheard by: g$
Office drone #1: Is there any money left for this?
Gay manager: No. Well, there's some money, but I can't give it all to you.
Office drone #1: Well, we need more.
Gay manager: Well, you can't have more. I'll give you half, okay?
Office drone #1: God, you are such a tight arse.
Office drone #2, in panic: You can't say that to a gay homosexual!
South Morang
Australia
Overheard by: Straight and amused.
Indian woman: How was your holiday?
White man: Uh, holiday?
Indian woman: Yeah, Rosher Hana?
White man: Rosh Hashanah?
Indian woman: Yeah.
White man: I'm not Jewish.
Indian woman: Oh, you're not?
White man: No. I told you that when you asked me how Passover was.
Indian woman: (silence)
White man: That's okay. That was awhile ago.
Atlanta, Georgia
Employee #1: You know we have envelopes with windows so you don't have to print an envelope?
Employee #2: Yeah, but it's sad news… So I thought it deserved its own envelope.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Sales associate #1, bringing in carts: Oh man, we got another wet one.
Sales associate #2: That's what she… um, do we still need to work on that display?
Portland, Oregon
