Questions

10AM Conference Call

Manager #1: So, do you have a hurricane there?
Manager #2: There is no hurricane in Atlanta at this time. It’s way over near the Yucatan.
Manager #1: Oh. So will you get any of it?
Manager #2: It’s like a thousand miles away. It’s a little too soon to tell how much it will affect us at this point.
Manager #3: I heard that Wilma is the last name they have on the list.
Manager #1: Ha, ha! What will they do if another one comes? Start over?
Manager #2: They will use Greek letters.
Manager #1: Ha, ha, ha!
Manager #2: That wasn’t a joke.
Manager #1: Oh. Ha, ha! So, the next one will be like Hurricane
“XVII” and then Hurricane “XVIII”? Ha, ha!
Manager #2: No. Those are Roman numerals.

5601 N. Lindero Canyon Road
Westlake Village, California

2PM Seminar–Mandatory!

Speaker: What was the craziest thing you’ve ever done?
Attendee: Jumped off a bridge into a river in Fiji.
Speaker: Why’d you do that?
Attendee: ‘Cause Tony Robbins told me to.

481 8th Avenue
New York, NY

11AM Interview

Corporate peon #1: I was nervous during the interview. More than normal for some reason. He asked too many damn questions.
Corporate peon #2: Hard questions?
Corporate peon #1: Not hard. Just required detailed answers. I don’t like the “what do you bring to the table” question.
Corporate peon #2: “I bring diligence and a positive attitude, I’m proactive and can get the job done on my own or with a group.”
Corporate peon #1: I bring sexiness.

11601 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

12PM Call Building Maintenance

Coordinator: Is it like really hot in here, or am I having early menopause?

150 5th Avenue
New York, NY

12PM Dry Out Printer

Co-worker #1: How do I make this print faster?
Co-worker #2: Put water on it.

10960 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Selaf Nek

…And Can I Do That from My Computer?

Worker: First, go to the website. [says URL]Customer: Do I need to go online first?

Maryland

I Thought He Looked Different Today

Coworker #1: Is Corey supervising tonight?
Coworker #2: No. Look. See, he doesn't have pants on.

Trenton, New Jersey

Overheard by: He Does Have Nice Legs.

So Are We Just Chitchatting, or Are We Robbing This Bank?

Guy #1: [Scratches his chest.]Guy #2: You ok?
Guy #1: Yeah… My chest itches. I shaved it.
Guy #2: You shaved your chest?
Guy #1: Yeah.
Guy #2: Why? That’s not like shaving your balls… You shave your balls, right?
Guy #1: Oh yeah, I shave everything below my belly button.

Mahwah, New Jersey

Damn You, Gloria Steinem, You've Foiled Me for the Last Time! *shakes Fist*

Female coworker, after cutting in line to get her lunch: What happened to “ladies first”?
Male coworker: The womens' rights movement.

Potrero Hill
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: amanda

He Was Much Worse Before the Diversity Training

Suit: You’re Asian, so I bet you want tea. We Americans like our morning coffee.
Asian interviewee #1: No, I had Starbucks on the way here.
Suit: We Americans like milk in our coffee. Asians drink it black, right?
Asian interviewee #2: No, I take mine light and sweet.
Suit: Well, you still wanna work here, right?

Midtown
New York, New York

Overheard by: Laughing in America

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