Cubicle dweller on phone: The problem is: it's a very large pole with a very small head, and it's very ridiculous-looking.
Bristol, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: signguy
Cubicle dweller on phone: The problem is: it's a very large pole with a very small head, and it's very ridiculous-looking.
Bristol, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: signguy
Man on cell: Where the hell is my box of mustaches?
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: CarnivorousGnar
HR director: You look like hell. I mean, seriously exhausted.
HR manager: Thanks. That makes me feel tons better. Let me try it–you look like you're coming off of a three-day bender!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Evil woman: So I heard this question on the radio this morning: would you rather be fat and someone think you're pregnant, or someone think you are a prostitute? That's just retarded, because you can fix pregnant…and fat. You can't fix prostitute.
St Louis, Missouri
Salon receptionist: How can I help you?
Girl: I would like to schedule an appointment for acrylic nails.
Salon receptionist: Okay, can I get your first and last name?
Girl: Sure, it's Lindsay… (long pause) …I forgot the second question.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Really…?!
Coworker: Oh, what a cute baby! Maybe you'll have a baby that cute!
Pregnant coworker, looking at pic of cute baby on internet: I'm not counting on it.
Coworker: Ummm…why?
Pregnant coworker: Have you ever noticed how the most attractive people always have the ugliest babies? Yeah, I am not having a cute kid.
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Noodle
Male worker #1, talking about the future: We probably will all be huge fat blobs staring into our computer screens, like in Wall-E.
Female worker: I doubt it. I bet they'll have a drug that makes everybody really attractive.
Male worker #2: They already do! It's called “alcohol.”
Portland, Oregon
Boss: He's really similar to my step dad–he had dark hair, and a long corso.
Girl: I'm sorry, a long *what*?
Boss, slowly: A long…corso?
Girl: Torso. Corset.
Boss: Hmm.
San Jose, California
Overheard by: Smarter than her boss (obviously)
Male coworker to female coworker: Did you get your legs waxed? Geez, your legs are so shiny I can see my face in them.
Orlando, Florida
New male employee: Does our company have a policy restricting facial hair?
HR: No. If we started restricting facial hair for men, then we'd have to restrict the women too and that's just too much work.
Technology Parkway, Massachusetts
