Manager: If you want to get in on the Vulcan mind meld, you gotta come over here and chug some of this maple syrup.
650 Park Avenue
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Manager: If you want to get in on the Vulcan mind meld, you gotta come over here and chug some of this maple syrup.
650 Park Avenue
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Lowly assistant: We are supposed to have our monthly, quarterly, and annual goals prepared for Tuesday’s meeting.
Lawyer: Really? Tell the office manager to send me everyone else’s goals.
Office manager: I probably won’t have them before the meeting.
Lawyer: But I don’t know what my goals are.
1500 Market Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: It’s Comcastic
Chief: Tom's got it all wrong. Most of the gay men I meet are eloquent, they're fit, into the arts. Tom's none of this things. He's fat, he's got a mass of body hair, bad breath…it's like he's only gay in his brain.
Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania
Cube rat #1: Kids say the darndest things…
Cube rat #2: That's why I ain't had no kids.
Horsham, Pennsylvania
Coworker: So she was telling me she had no money to pay her bill because she invested all her money into a llama farm, and then the llamas got slaughtered.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: WD40
CSR on phone: Please sir, stop yelling at me. (pause) You do not need to swear at me. (pause) You call me that one more time and I'm going to hang up. (pause) Yeah, I'm still here. (pause, then hangs up) The best part was he told me to die.
Phildelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: headsethottie
Female coworker, about current object of infatuation: Oh…he is so cute, you have to see him. I just love him. I will bring in his mugshot.
Male coworker: He has a mugshot?
Female coworker: Yeah, but he only beats his girlfriends when he is on drugs. He is so sweet. He used to save me a seat on the bus when we were in school.
Mountville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Mindy
Announcement: We are currently experiencing a telephone outage. For
emergencies and medical conditions, please call [498-8565].
3811 O’Hara Street
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Office manager: …and his mantle, it’s made out of Bubinga!
Designer: What the hell is Bubinga?
Writer: It’s Ubuntu’s neighbor?
Designer: Do they have a Wiki?
Writer: Yeah, I think they do!
100 West Broad Street
Hazleton, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Slave to technology
Woman ordering: Guess what I want today!
Sandwich guy: The usual?
Woman ordering, completely seriously: Yeah, except I'm going to change a few things up. Like…the bread and the stuff on it, ya know?
Cafeteria
Horsham, Pennsylvania
