Coworker on the phone: So let me get this straight. You have my money so you don't give a shit.
Oldwick, New Jersey
Coworker on the phone: So let me get this straight. You have my money so you don't give a shit.
Oldwick, New Jersey
Suit on cell: I touched my toes for the first time in ten years last Tuesday.
Los Angeles, California
Female manager on call: That thing is huge! Is it six inches?!
Lewiston, Maine
New office drama queen, on phone: Well see, I just found out my cousin has five different baby mamas. I don't feel bad about having two different baby daddies.
Seattle, Washington
Administrator, on phone: What? The internet's going to go down? Why don't you just suck all the oxygen out of the building?
Manhattan, New York
Pregnant employee on personal call: I tried to have an ultrasound done but it didn't work out. Nothing to do with the baby–it was my uterus. It's an asshole.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Gwen Styles
Teen on cell: Well, you know … She just has that certain “jism” that is so attractive.
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: You Mean Mojo
Skinny teenage girl on phone to friend: So anyway, I told him he ain't giving me oral sex first thing in the morning. It's like, so gross. My vagina might get morning breath!
Kingswood
Australia
Overheard by: breath mints anyone?
Coworker's friend, on speakerphone: I do nothing useful in this organization, and I'm committed to continuing to do just that.
Manhattan, New York
Coworker on phone: Are you sitting down? Okay… I need you to understand you do not feed dog food to your sister. What you did was not okay. Your punishment is no iPod, no computer, no television, you are grounded to your room. You love to write, right? Well, I want you to go to your room and write a story of two sisters who love each other, but one sister was mean and tricked her sister into eating dog food. This sister must apologize to her sister that she tricked, and to mom and dad. You will read this story aloud.
Silicon Valley
California
