Just Demonstrate While I Take Photos

Woman holding inhaler: So I just cock it and suck on it?
Nurse: You might not want to put it just that way.

2955 Farnam Street
Omaha, Nebraska

Posted on June 7, 2015
Advice, Nebraska, Nurses

Yeah, But I Spent Years in Medical School Honing Those Skills

Nurse to doctor: I mean, you've got to have something to live for.
Doctor to nurse: Yeah, you at least gotta be able to fuck somebody or piss somebody off.
Nurse to doctor: And from what I hear, you're great at both!

Springfield, Illinois

Overheard by: SWARD

Posted on June 2, 2015
Doctors, Illinois, Nurses, Philosophy, Violence, Weirdness

The DVD Is Selling Very Well

Nurse to another nurse: So that’s how you get all those huge objects in your happy hole!

1600 SW Archer Road
Gainesville, Florida

Overheard by: SuperClerk

Posted on May 8, 2015
Florida, Gossip, Nurses, Possible Sexual Harassment

Baby with Plastic Bag on Head: I’m Slowly Asphyxiating, Moms

Nurse: Yeah, and she came in with a bandanna rotting inside her. Her brilliant boyfriend used it as a condom.
Girl #1: Dude! Sperm will soak right through that shit! He should have used a plastic bag or something. Maybe some Saran Wrap and a rubber band.
Girl #2: Seriously! What if she got pregnant?
Girl #1: The baby will come out with a doo-rag on its head, saying, ‘Whassup, Moms?!’

Saratoga & Kiely

Overheard by: People are sick

Posted on April 28, 2015
California, Coworkers, Default, General Idiocy, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, Nurses, Sexuality

9AM Doctor’s Appointment

Doctor: Did you put the drugs in the drug room?
Nurse: No! I can’t find where they are supposed to go. Every time I try and find the drugs in that room I want to kill somebody!
Doctor: Please don’t. We shouldn’t be killing any more patients anyway.

250 West Bridge Street
Dublin, Ohio

Posted on April 25, 2015
Advice, Death, Doctors, Health & Hygiene, Nurses, Ohio, Questions, Substance Use & Abuse

Mr. Scott: I Dunno How Much More She Can Hold, Captain!

Semi technologically-challenged nurse practitioner: Everything is going to my draft box.

Aventura, Florida

Overheard by: Lizzo

Posted on April 19, 2015
Body Parts, Florida, Nurses, Sexuality, Weirdness

I'm Working Towards My Master's in Evacuation

Nurse: How have your bowel movements been?
Elderly man: Oh, very good, thank you! Would you like to see?

Hospital
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Molly

Posted on March 18, 2015
Health & Hygiene, New York, Nurses, Patients, Washington, Weirdness

9AM Doctor’s Appointment

Nurse #1: It’s more important that we get rid of the dead things in the clinic.
Nurse #2: The smell’s still there?
Nurse #3: Have you tried spraying the air with something?

1230 York Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Molly the Mole