Male postdoc: Are you sure you can’t do this experiment alone tomorrow?
Female postdoc: I’m sure! I’ll ask someone to help! I can’t do it alone! I’m too short! Pretty! Boobs, and stuff!
Physics Lab
Hunter College, New York
Male postdoc: Are you sure you can’t do this experiment alone tomorrow?
Female postdoc: I’m sure! I’ll ask someone to help! I can’t do it alone! I’m too short! Pretty! Boobs, and stuff!
Physics Lab
Hunter College, New York
Editor, looking at ad for “Summer Garden Madness”: Why is everything “madness”? There’s nothing “madness” about a basket of vegetables.
2 Penn Plaza
New York, New York
Overheard by: angry carrot
Asian employee: Why is everyone Asian?!
Chinatown
New York, New York
Overheard by: Murray
User: I don’t want a customer to be able to login and they might guess that their password is “welcome.”
Tech: We can change it to, let’s say, “monkey123.”
User: Well, what if they guess “monkey123”?
4 Columbus Circle
New York, NY
Co-worker #1: These new pants are great. I can spill anything on them and it just brushes right off. I wish I knew how they did it.
Co-worker #2: It’s nanotechnology.
7 Times Square
New York, NY
Boss: I think it’s time for a sodey!
Coworker: What, like, mix it yourself?
Boss: Yup! I’m going to jerk it right here at my desk!
Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York
Overheard by: talking-to-hr-about-moving-my-desk
Boss: From now on, people, we’re going to make Perfection our baseline.
The development team laughs.
Developer: Dude, whatever the fuck you’ve been reading, stop it.
1 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Mad William Flint
Peon to boss looking for the bigger boss: He is not there. He is murdering Mike*.
New York City, New York
Overheard by: has a will
Old coworker: What the hell is that on your chin?
Hipster coworker: I’m growing out my goatee.
Old coworker: Why the fuck would you do that?
Hipster coworker: A girl last night at the bar told me it looks sexy.
Old coworker: It looks like a buffer pad for a high speed cocksucker.
43 West 42nd Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: You’ll Get Crumbs In It
Employee on phone with a French company: I’m sorry that you’re offended that I don’t speak French, sir…Well, I don’t know what to tell you. I speak English and Korean; I just don’t speak French. We have a great offer here. I think you’d like to hear about it, even in English…Well, if you’d like I can speak to you with what French I do know but I’m afraid it will only be “hello” and “yes” or “no.”…I’m sorry that you think my lack of French represents what’s wrong with America in general…
61 Broadway
New York, New York
