Office guy: As I told him, it’s not the speed of the train that matters when a train hits you, it’s the force. They tried to do CPR and their hands just disappeared into his chest…
515 7th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Rosskel
Office guy: As I told him, it’s not the speed of the train that matters when a train hits you, it’s the force. They tried to do CPR and their hands just disappeared into his chest…
515 7th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Rosskel
Tech director to stagehand in pink jacket: Okay, new rule — you can come to work drunk, but you can’t dress up.
Washington Park
Albany, New York
Tennis instructor to day-campers: You were special last year. You are not special anymore. If you still suck this year, leave these courts.
Birchwood Swim & Tennis Club
Chappaqua, New York
Overheard by: rachel kieffer
Receptionist, answering phone: Good afternoon, how can I help you? (pause) I'm sorry, she no longer works at this office. (hangs up phone)
Receptionist to executive secretary: It was for you.
New York City, New York
Cube dweller: Do not Google ‘Britney Spears’ vagina.’ All you get is porn.
455 Broadway
New York, New York
Overheard by: Alex
Former secretary: They fired me! Can you believe that? They fired me because they said I had a shitty fuckin’ attitude!
Student government office
New York, New York
Overheard by: Still laughing
Security guard: No man, the race is called Jew, the religion is called Jewdity.
1515 Broadway
New York, NY
Office girl #1: Hey Jessica*, that's weird.
Office girl #2: What?
Office girl #1: That I don't exist.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: J-Bone
Pretty woman: Thanks for fixing my computer!
Geeky computer guy: Maria*, you know I’m always thinking about you.
Pretty woman: And thanks for not calling that to my attention too often.
125th Street
New York, New York
Teen employee: I’m so worried about getting into college. Although, I really don’t know what I want to do with my life.
Middle-aged boss: You’d make a great stripper.
Teen employee: You know, I’ve considered it.
Bookstore
New York, New York
Overheard by: I guess I won’t apply for a job after all
