Michigan

Intern: North Korea is only the scariest country on the planet.

Ann Arbor, Michigan

Overheard by: Temp

Coworker on phone: Ugh, it's just the bloating and the pain. (pause) Oh, wait! I think things are on the move! (rushes to bathroom)

Ypsilanti, Michigan

Overheard by: CubeDweller

Female HR manager: He came way too early this morning. He was coming fast. And then he didn't have time to do what he was supposed to do for me.

Ann Arbor, Michigan

Accountant: I'm anti math.
Intern: Aren't you an accountant?

Kalamazoo, Michigan

Overheard by: Meg

Wife: Did you get my text about the nasty whore pig?
Husband: Yes, I got the text about the nasty whore pig, what exactly is wrong with you?

Wyandotte, Michigan

Overheard by: Trish

Macho supervisor: Yeah, she had that kind of short lesbo hair. I don't like that. Ya know what I mean?
Short-haired female cube dweller: We get it. You can't keep a woman you can't grab by the hair.

Belleville, Michigan

Overheard by: noe

Patient, filling out medical history form: It says here to list street drugs being used. (pause) Is insulin a street drug? I have been diabetic since I was a kid.

Warren, Michigan

Customer: Do you have ornaments of cities?
Employee: Yes, over here.
Customer: I'm looking for Seattle, it will probably have the Space Needle on it.
Employee: Sorry, I don't see that. We have astronauts, though.

Christmas Store
Frankenmuth, Michigan

Overheard by: Anita

Older IT sales guy: Years ago, I once sold to a porn company without even knowing it.
Younger IT sales guy: I bet porn companies would be great to work with–they've got so many IT needs!
Older IT sales guy: Not really. They really stiffed me.

Detroit, Michigan

Cube rat #1: These nuts taste old.
Cube rat #2: What did you just say?
Cube rat #1: Nothing.

Detroit, Michigan