IT guy: It sounds just like the snack bell, and it makes me drool every time.
Richmond, Virginia
IT guy: It sounds just like the snack bell, and it makes me drool every time.
Richmond, Virginia
Boss: Anyone want a croissant? I have some leftovers!
New hire: I don't eat croissants. I did once, I was nine, and I got a really bad headache.
Advertising Agency
Richmond, Virginia
Cube girl: I am starving suddenly. Like, Albania-starving.
Cube guy: Are people starving in Albania?
Cube girl: The anorexic ones.
350 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Boss who never listens: I need you to pick up the trash in the parking lot before the bank comes today.
Worker: Pork chop sandwiches!
Boss who never listens: Okay, great, let me know when you are done.
Lakewood, Washington
Coworker: Oooh, look at that microwave. It’s all ’50s and industrial and stuff.
Boss: Yeah, look how big it is. You could cook a whole baby in there!
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Glad I’m not her baby
Puzzled teen: And I'm like… What is Jesus doing in my cheetos?
Hillsboro, Oregon
Overheard by: Beth
President: Hello! What are you doing today?
Director, eating canister of Planter's Peanuts: I'm eating my nuts!
Atlanta, Georgia
Male coworker, after being given a fresh donut: I don't think I could be anymore of your friend than I am right now.
Female coworker: Yeah, it just peaked out.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Doughnut King
Engineer #1: This milk’s gone bad.
Engineer #2: So you just put three quarters of a gallon of bad milk back in the fridge?
Engineer #1: I told Hal* this morning and he said he’d take care of it, but obviously never did, so now whoever used it is gonna end up sick in bed tomorrow.
Architect: That’s ok, it’s supposed to rain tomorrow.
71 West 23rd Street
New York, New York
Boss: Did you draw on my banana?
Hofstra University
Long Island, New York
