Security guard to boss: Michael Jackson loved apricots. Don't forget.
Burbank, California
Security guard to boss: Michael Jackson loved apricots. Don't forget.
Burbank, California
Ghetto-fab girl: Hey, is your chicken made with real chicken?
Employee: Uh… yes?
Ghetto-fab girl: Like, it’s made with the real chicken that lays eggs and stuff like that?
Employee: Yes, ma’am. The chicken is made with real, egg-laying chicken.
Food court, Westfield West County Mall
Des Peres, Missouri
Boss to others, while riding to lunch: You don't want to eat at Infinity, the only thing on the menu there is penis.
Pittsbrurgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Brad
Customer: Hey, where's my fucking wasabi, bitch?
Sushi girl: I don't think you asked for…
Manager: I don't know. But I can tell you this–it'll be up your fucking arse if your manners don't improve.
Sushi girl: Wanker!
Manager: Don't swear at work.
Adelaide, Australia
Coworker #1: Thanks for the tea.
Coworker #2: I didn't know how you like it so I just did it how I like it. Wet and warm is jut fine.
Dover
England
Coworker, about truffles for office-sponsored fundraiser: Okay then, so we'll have truffles rolled in espresso, red sprinkles and peanuts…wait, did we scratch the nuts?
Rice Lake, Wisconsin
Boss: I need two Excedrin and a Pepsi, stat!
Coworker, trying to be helpful: How about some cheese and nerds?
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Coworker #1, about potato chips: I enjoy regular Lays.
Coworker #2: Who doesn't?
Scarborough
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Cnote
Boss: So do you think I should get 3 pies for the meeting since we have 30 people?
Worker Bee #1: Sure, 3 pies should be enough.
Worker Bee #2: I think you need more than 3.
Worker Bee #1: How many do you think we should get?
Worker Bee #2: We need 3.14159 pi.
Boss: Get out of my office. Now.
1010 Second Avenue
San Diego, California
Courtesy clerk: Can I help you find something, sir?
Male customer: Yes. I need condoms and cake right now! If I can’t get one tonight, I need the other. Can you hurry?
Grocery store
California
Overheard by: Daphne
