Coworker, about truffles for office-sponsored fundraiser: Okay then, so we'll have truffles rolled in espresso, red sprinkles and peanuts…wait, did we scratch the nuts?
Rice Lake, Wisconsin
Coworker, about truffles for office-sponsored fundraiser: Okay then, so we'll have truffles rolled in espresso, red sprinkles and peanuts…wait, did we scratch the nuts?
Rice Lake, Wisconsin
Boss: I need two Excedrin and a Pepsi, stat!
Coworker, trying to be helpful: How about some cheese and nerds?
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Coworker #1, about potato chips: I enjoy regular Lays.
Coworker #2: Who doesn't?
Scarborough
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Cnote
Boss: So do you think I should get 3 pies for the meeting since we have 30 people?
Worker Bee #1: Sure, 3 pies should be enough.
Worker Bee #2: I think you need more than 3.
Worker Bee #1: How many do you think we should get?
Worker Bee #2: We need 3.14159 pi.
Boss: Get out of my office. Now.
1010 Second Avenue
San Diego, California
Courtesy clerk: Can I help you find something, sir?
Male customer: Yes. I need condoms and cake right now! If I can’t get one tonight, I need the other. Can you hurry?
Grocery store
California
Overheard by: Daphne
Administrative assistant: Of course, all us darkies love fried chicken.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: …wrong on so many levels
(scientist gets in a packed elevator)
Scientist: I can’t believe it’s this busy the day before Thanksgiving.
Secretary: Surprisingly.
Scientist: I said: “I can’t believe it’s this busy!” It’s the day before Thanksgiving!
Tech: It’s actually two days from Thanksgiving.
Scientist: I’m going to go home and make my turkey tonight. Have it ready for the family!
Suit: What a good idea. You should make the stuffing with it, save time.
(scientist smiles, gets off)
Tech: That wasn’t nice.
Suit: He farted while in an elevator, I don’t care.
Extremely Small Elevator
Research Triangle Park, North Carolina
Coworker, after scavenging through lunch meeting leftovers: My sandwich didn’t look very fulfilling so I added some corned beef.
Fellow scavenger: Wait -there was corned beef in there?
Coworker: No, I keep some in my office for emergencies.
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: Nook
Office guy: The spread is great! What are these? (points at mini cream puffs)
Office girl: I don't know, just try one.
Office guy: Um, okay.
Office girl, after popping one in her mouth: Ohmigod! I just had a squirt of awesomeness in my mouth!
Coral Gables, Florida
Overheard by: Dianna Plasencia
Coworker on the phone: Once I stabbed myself in the leg with a knife, and my husband made me a BLT sandwich.
Butler, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Benjamin
