Woman: My sister got out of rehab on Tuesday and died of an overdose on Friday, and I just got the rehab bill in the mail.
Friend: I’d tell thems to stick ‘at bill up they asses — that shit didn’t work! It’s like gettin’ a bad weave! You don’t pay fo’ no bad weaves, does you?
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Co-Worker: I spilled my milk this morning and my husband was like, "Don’t cry over spilled milk." He’s always saying funny things like that.
Carmel, Indiana
Older woman: It isn’t good for your metabolism to eat too little.
Younger woman: Yeah, I remember when I was a kid and saw those starving African kids on TV. I said, “They aren’t fat, look at their bellies!” That’s what happens when you don’t eat enough, you get bloated.
1500 University Drive
Billings, Montana
Co-worker #1: Do you want to go to lunch?
Co-worker #2: I’m on a diet.
Co-worker #1: But we’re going to get ice cream afterward.
800 E. 96th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Co-worker on phone: …So if that wasn’t enough, she signs the email
“LOL”. Now you can’t tell me that wasn’t completely obnoxious…Yeah. Lots of luck…Oh. But, still…
1236 Shannon Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana
Clerk: I saw you driving earlier, did you get your license back?
Customer: Yeah, it's all good now. If I could only stay out of the bar…
Clerk: You don't think there's a connection between those two things?
Customer: What do you mean?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: BFS
Office girl #1: I hear some women have an orgasm when going through childbirth.
Office girl #2: Not unless you've got a finger in my butthole.
West Lafayette, Indiana
Guy #1: You have to try this.
Guy #2: No, that's okay.
Guy #1: Seriously, you have to.
Guy #2: I'm not putting your nuts in my mouth.
Guy #1: (walks away)
Fort Wayne, Indiana
Owner: He's a great guy. Well, he can be a great guy. Sometimes. Okay, he's dying. He has cancer.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Stunned server, after seeing shapely female exec chef in street clothes: Chef! You're a girl!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: irrelevant
Claims supervisor to claims processor: You will need to send out a denial form on this one. The renter's policy does not cover contraction of sexually transmitted diseases while visiting the apartment.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: GirlFriday
