Pregnant coworker: Are you allowed to drink when you're breastfeeding? Is it just like when you're pregnant?
Distraught coworker: Why are we mammals? Why can't we just lay eggs and drink beer?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Sarah R.
Pregnant coworker: Are you allowed to drink when you're breastfeeding? Is it just like when you're pregnant?
Distraught coworker: Why are we mammals? Why can't we just lay eggs and drink beer?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Sarah R.
Employee #1: Why are you pulling all of those nuts off the shelf?
Employee #2: They were recalled because of the salmonella outbreak.
Employee #1: Oh. I didn't know there was peanut butter in those nuts.
Ohio
Overheard by: Sofa Kingdom
Police officer (signing to the tune of Animal Crackers in My Soup): I like maggots in my soup…
Police Department
Randolph, New Jersey
Loud office chick: You're growing new bones in your body! You have to drink milk!
Hudson Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Consultant: Menopause is not a one-day thing!
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: M@
Employee to coworker who won't stop talking: Oh, yeah, you get all mouthy now. But when the auditors come by, you get quiet and have diarrhea.
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: factory drone
CPR instructor: … And how do we tell if an infant isn’t breathing? He will flail around a little and will also turn blue or purple.
Black cop: Um, not trying to be an ass, but what if the baby is my color?
White cop: Oh yeah… That’s known as blurple.
CPR Class, Police Department
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Worker bee: What is the regional center?
Facilities worker: They deal more with like, handicapped people, and you know…retarded stuff.
Santa Ana, California
Overheard by: Joe Garca
Lawyer to another: Just so you know, I'm going to make a concerted effort to quit picking my nose.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jeeb
Coworker #1: Hey, does anyone here have the athlete’s foot?
Coworker #2: Not currently… But I think Jerry* has jock itch.
Coworker #1: Thanks. You’ve been real helpful.
Peachtree Parkway
Norcross, Georgia
Overheard by: disease free
