For Example, I’m Happy to Be Talking to You

Senior consultant: I’m not sure that the wow factors you listed here are really wow factors.
Consultant: Meh, I’m easily pleased.

209-215 Blackfriars Road
London
England

Overheard by: Underwhelmed

Posted on April 2, 2008
Bosses, Comebacks, Consultants, Default, Gripes, London

It’s Like You Learned Nothing in Clown College

Whiny girl: I don’t know why anyone won’t take me seriously!
Mentor: Well, Kimmy*, you’ve got to show some confidence.

San Antonio, Texas

Overheard by: Not Steffi

Posted on April 1, 2008
Advice, Default, Gripes, Students, Teachers, Texas

“Chill”? Inappropriate Tone? That Monster!

Lady peon: I had a third thing to mention to you.
Manager: Okay, go ahead.
Lady peon: When I was on the phone with Susan*, she got mad at me. She told me to chill in a very inappropriate tone.
Manager: Uh-huh.
Lady peon: I think she’ll sabotage your party over this. I think she’s gone around the bend.
Manager: You think she’s gone around the bend?

Paramus, New Jersey

Overheard by: Making Copies

Posted on March 31, 2008
Bosses and Underlings, Default, Gossip, Gripes, New Jersey

Seems Like a Lot of Work to Get Another Job, Though

Designer: … And then [the director] said, ‘What else did you accomplish today?’ Can you believe that?!
Writer: What the hell business is it of his what you do here?
Designer: And so what if I did go to lunch with you for three hours? Is that a crime? Can a man not waste a little time on the company dollar anymore? What the hell kind of place is this becoming?!
Writer: I ask myself that everyday.

16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona

Posted on March 28, 2008
Arizona, Default, Designers and Photographers, Gossip, Gripes, Time Management, Writers and Editors

He Couldn’t Stop and Had to Be Put Down

Project coordinator on phone: They moved people into my area… No! They already moved them into my area… Yes, I know it’s my area, dammit! I already peed on the desks and claimed them as mine!

Alexandria, Virginia

Overheard by: Still can’t stop laughing!!!

Posted on March 27, 2008
Bosses, Default, Geography & History, Gripes, Virginia

As a Freudian, He Thinks All Poontangs Stink

Therapist #1: Oh my god! Look at Britney Spears!
Therapist #2: I bet her poontang stinks.

California

Overheard by: Britney’s Got Issues

Posted on March 27, 2008
Body Parts, California, Coworkers, Default, Gripes, Pop culture, Sensory Experiences

My Timberlands Really Would’ve Come in Handy in This Weather

Girl looking out window at rain: I picked a bad day to go straight.

Clarksville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Girl 3

Posted on March 21, 2008
Coworkers, Default, Gripes, Sexuality, Tennessee, Time Management

The New Mantra of the Global Economy

Coworker on phone: Yeah. Unemployed is just un-fun. So, I’m happy with what I got. Even if it rapes me.

Alpharetta, Georgia

Posted on March 20, 2008
Compliments, Coworkers, Default, Georgia, Gripes, On the phone, Words

In North Carolina, You Can Get Anything at a Bait and Tackle Shop

Sales guy: I was thinking of going to Bert’s Bait and Tackle to get some hot dogs for lunch.
Sales assistant: You buy hot dogs at a bait and tackle store?!

8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on March 20, 2008
Default, Gripes, Meals and Snacks, North Carolina, Questions, Sales

You’re Right about the Cemetary Plots, but Not for the Reason You Think

Bimbette peon: This is my last weekend of being twenty-one! I can’t believe I’m so old. I might as well start picking out cemetery plots. I am going to get shit-faced this weekend — my last weekend of youth! [Old coworker stares blankly.]

Glen Allen, Virginia

Overheard by: Tisk Tisk

Posted on March 18, 2008
Age and ageing, Bimbettes, Default, Drinking, General Idiocy, Gripes, Virginia

Gripes