Event planner: Oh, damn, this is terrible news. I just lost a snack set-up. First the breakfast burritos and now this! What’s next… Anything but the Swedish fish!
West 23rd Street
New York City, New York
Receptionist, putting her coat on: So, I’ll see you guys on Monday, have a good weekend!
Coworkers, walking out of their offices: Uh… You know it’s only four o’clock, right?
[Silence.]Receptionist, removing coat: Dang, I was almost out the door too. Teaches me to say goodbye.
Dodge Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: Brandy
Office drone: Ahhhh crap! I peed on the floor. If I knew I was going to pee on the floor today, I’d never have come to work.
From within a Stall in the Men’s Restroom, Office Building
Rochester, Minnesota
Black female coworker: Oooh, honey, I love me some fags. Fags is the best girlfriends.
White queer coworker: That’s ’cause we all want to be black women!
White female coworker: Can the rest of us get workplace diversity hours for listening to this shit?
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Giggling in my cube
Diner in expensive restaurant, arguing over the bill for his family Christmas party: This wine is a lot cheaper in the grocery store!
Manager: And what would your in-laws think of you if you had the family Christmas party in isle three of a super Wal-Mart?
Illinios Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Developer, talking about boss: Yeah, and I was giving him crap because he wouldn’t come out with us because his wife’s gay… I mean pregnant!
State & Water
Peoria, Illinois
Overheard by: only girl in an office of men…
Senior consultant: I’m not sure that the wow factors you listed here are really wow factors.
Consultant: Meh, I’m easily pleased.
209-215 Blackfriars Road
London
England
Overheard by: Underwhelmed
Lady peon: I had a third thing to mention to you.
Manager: Okay, go ahead.
Lady peon: When I was on the phone with Susan*, she got mad at me. She told me to chill in a very inappropriate tone.
Manager: Uh-huh.
Lady peon: I think she’ll sabotage your party over this. I think she’s gone around the bend.
Manager: You think she’s gone around the bend?
Paramus, New Jersey
Overheard by: Making Copies
Designer: … And then [the director] said, ‘What else did you accomplish today?’ Can you believe that?!
Writer: What the hell business is it of his what you do here?
Designer: And so what if I did go to lunch with you for three hours? Is that a crime? Can a man not waste a little time on the company dollar anymore? What the hell kind of place is this becoming?!
Writer: I ask myself that everyday.
16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona
