Government employee to admin: Do we have any vanilla folders up here?
Admin: Let me check. No more vanilla folders. We'll have to order some more.
Department of Justice
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Tasty Office Supplies
Government employee to admin: Do we have any vanilla folders up here?
Admin: Let me check. No more vanilla folders. We'll have to order some more.
Department of Justice
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Tasty Office Supplies
Person #1: Legs, arms, everywhere!
Person #2: Like, male and female?
Person #1: Yes!
Government Office
Ottawa
Canadia
Overheard by: Laura
Boss lady: So this list needs to be redone and given back to me. The deadline is July 1st.
New worker: But it's August 10th!
Boss lady: Oh, honey, you work for the Government now, nobody gets in a hurry when they work for the Government.
Raleigh,North Carolina
Skanky girl #1: I’m never wearing miniskirts again!
Skanky girl #2: Why is that?
Skanky girl #1: Well, every time I’m dancing in one, someone tries to sodomize me.
Skanky girl #2: Oh, I hate that–it’s so rude.
DMV
New York
Security guy: I could be an officer, you know.
Sarge: Oh, shut the fuck up.
Security guy: No, really. It’s just politics stopping me! Just politics!
Sarge: Oh, is Rudy fucking Giuliani preventing you from becoming a police officer? Why don’t you fucking explain that to all of us?
Public Safety
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
Man in lift: How are you, Susan*?
Woman: Radiant, *Stuart.
Government Office
London
England
Male federal employee: I loved those old Startac phones because all they were was a phone. They didn’t take pictures. They didn’t predict your ovulation cycle. They just took calls!
Independence Avenue
Washington, DC
Large coworker: What you do is you split the Krispy Kreme in half and grill it, then put the cheeseburger on it, and I swear, it’s the best way to have it.
Capitol Hill
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Jessica
Elevator-Rider #1: Hey, are you still working in homicide?
Elevator-Rider #2: Nah, I left homicide a while ago. Now I’m in sexual predators. It’s great ’cause I don’t have to be on call anymore, and I have weekends free.
King County Administration Building
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: B
Librarian #1: Is that you, Chelsea*?
Librarian #2: Yes.
Librarian #1: Oh good. I thought I waved to the wrong person.
Librarian #2: Oh, I didn’t see you wave.
Librarian #1, exasperated: Well I did it under the stall.
Librarian #2: I was looking at the wall.
Librarian #1, still exasperated: Well, let me do it again then.
401 Merritt 7
Norwalk, Connecticut
Overheard by: Proof Positive
