Teller: I haven’t decided yet if I’m going to see The Da Vinci Code. I want to see it, but if I do I’ll feel like I’m. . . supporting. You know?
Bank AVP: . . . Supporting?
Teller: The Devil!
Long pause
Bank AVP: Tom Hanks is the devil?
48 Clifty Kirkmansville Road
Clifty, Kentucky
Co-worker #1: Those jokes you emailed were really funny.
Co-worker #2: Yeah they were. Which one was your favorite?
Co-worker #1: Number twelve.
Co-worker #2: Which one was that one?
Co-worker #1: Um, the one right after number eleven, dork.
910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas
Bank teller: I was working drive-through this morning and offered a customer a bone for her dog in the back seat.
Associate: I think it’s nice that we do that.
Bank teller: The customer said it wasn’t a dog, it was her mother.
801 West Big Beaver Road
Troy, Michigan
Professional: So, at the conference we stay four people to a room, two to each double bed.
Student worker: Two people in a double bed?! Can two people even fit in a double bed if they aren’t having sex?
60 Washington Square South
New York, New York
Overheard by: amused queer
Peon #1: Don't put that paper in the bin, it won't get recycled. Put it in the confidential waste bin, the stuff in there does get recycled.
Peon #2: But it's not confidential waste.
Peon #1: Well, write a secret on it and then put it in, if that'll make you feel better.
Glasgow
Scotland
Overheard by: PumpkinSpider
Worker #1: How’s everything with the baby?
Worker #2: He seems to be pleased with his accommodations. At least he hasn’t complained verbally.
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Pharm tech, counting out RX: These pills smell like pills. (pharmacist sighs)
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: PharmD
Lady peon: What do you call those cows that you eat?
114 New Street
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: russ
Angry boss: Aristotle is not Belgian!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Hear No Evil
Nurse: She’s been so much better today. Chatty. She still walks around like this [puts chin to chest], but she came up to me and was like, "How are you today?" I said, "Huh? Oh, I’m fine!" Maybe it’s the Celexa.
Psychiatrist: Actually we’re weaning her off the Celexa. We started her on Effexor.
Nurse: Oh, well, maybe that’s it.
Psychiatrist: She’s only been on it one day. That wouldn’t really be long enough.
Nurse: No, that’s not… Celexa… I think I was taking that when I got into a fight at the airport. You know those guys with the M-16s? Well, I told this one bitch I was gonna jump over the counter and take her out.
Girl: That was Celexa?
Nurse, smiling: Yeah.
Oregon State Hospital
Salem, Oregon
