General Idiocy

Hair salon receptionist: My last boyfriend cheated on me.
Nail girl: Oh, that’s terrible. I had one boyfriend cheat on me in the past, too.
Hair salon receptionist: Well, you know what they say, “Hindsight is 24/7.”

3202 E. Los Angeles Avenue
Simi Valley, California

Overheard by: Bruce Bristol

Dell Support operator: OK, sir, now I’m going to need you to insert your System CD. Do you have that handy?
Irish customer: Is dat dis Pentanium ting?

The other listeners on conference laugh.

Dell Support operator: Excuse me, sir, there’s a lot of background noise. I’m just going to turn off the other microphones.

–As a novel approach to caller boredom while waiting for a techSupp droid to become free, Dell have instituted a situation where callers get to listen in while said droid deals with the calls ahead of one in the queue.

So the overhearing was actually pretty widely geographically
distributed, between:

The charmin’ Irish Callcentre colleen, who was wherever in Ireland Dell have their support centre;
Her interlocutor, who by his accent was also in that country;
The various other listeners-in, who might have been anywhere in
Europe;
Me, at Long Lane, Newbury, England.

Overheard by: CDWriter

Co-worker #1: You need to use more tact.
Co-worker #2: Attack what?
Co-worker #1: No, tact. T-A-C-T.
Co-worker #2: What’s that?
Co-worker #1: Exactly.

845 Third Avenue
New York, NY

Girl: Yeah, I’m trying to apply for chemical engineering, but when I go to fill out the online application, it says that it’s closed, but then it says that the deadline isn’t until March 1st!
Student worker: It’s April…
Clueless co-ed: But..oh…wait…January…February…March…Oh! Oh, so, like, March is before April?

1 University Station
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: m.kyti

Co-worker: I figure, if he sends me to jail, I’m just going to call the judge a cocksucker. ‘Cause at that point, what can he do?

6111 Oak Tree Boulevard
Independence, Ohio

Guy #1: Hey, remember me? I worked with you guys before.
Guy #2: Yeah, yeah I remember.
Guy #1: Yeah, my mom called here and fired me.

272 E. Main Street
Patchogue, New York

Overheard by: Andrew G

Girl #1: You’re from Utah?
Girl #2: Yes.
Girl #1: Do they make you, like, wear bonnets there?
Girl #2: Yes.
Girl #1: Really?
Girl #2: No.

1000 Longfellow Blvd
Lakeland, Florida

Overheard by: Denise

Boss: Yeah, so when I run a report and it’s taking a long time, I always think, “Am I hung, or what?”.

2202 North West Shore Boulevard
Tampa, Florida

Office dweller: This office is sweltering. The thermometer says it’s 82 degrees in here.
Building heating/AC “expert”: I don’t trust thermometers. Them things are made in third world countries.

41 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Accountant: I’m sorry, were you talking to me? It’s loud inside my head.

1670 Broadway
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: John