Coworker #1: What branch of the military was he in?
Coworker #2: In the U.S.A. branch.
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Kain
Coworker #1: What branch of the military was he in?
Coworker #2: In the U.S.A. branch.
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Kain
Coworker #1: Who is George W. Bush? Which one is he?
Coworker #2: You have got to be kidding me.
Government Agency
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: laughing hysterically
Secretary on her first day: So, I should only delete the messages I don't want to keep?
Raleigh, North Carolina
Co-worker #1: We could stick it to his forehead like this.
Co-worker #2: Try it out before you stick it anywhere; mine’s kinda
sensitive.
2904 Westcorp Boulevard
Huntsville, Alabama
Overheard by: Josh Roberson
Worker: Lemon cod, please. With pasta and–
Server: Pasta’s an entree. Not a side.
Worker: Oh, I didn’t see it on the entree sign.
Server: That’s because it’s a side.
9000 Wisconsin Avenue
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Barb
Ladder-climber to boss: If you don't have a good enough argument for why I'm wrong, then I'm right.
Ohio
Customer: Here’s my order number.
CSR: Yes, how can I help you?
Customer: What can you tell me about my order?
CSR: Um. What would you like to know?
Customer: You tell me. What does your computer tell you?
CSR: It tells me lots of things. What you ordered, when you ordered it. How can I help you?
Customer: Tell me everything your screen tells you about my order.
CSR: What would you like to know?
Customer: No, I want to know what you know about my order.
CSR: Well, I can tell you when it shipped, when it was delivered. Would those help?
Customer: No. What else?
CSR: Well, it would take me a really long time to read you everything I have here.
Customer: Oh. Well, let me explain. [Gives explanation]CSR: I see. So you just want UPS to pick up this order?
Customer: Are you an idiot? That’s what I’ve been saying the whole time!
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon can’t wait for the weekend
Guy watching tv in break room: They have TVs in Bangkok? Isn't that in, like, China?
Halifax
Nova Scotia
Canadia
Teacher: Does anyone know what Sputnik was?
Student: That’s, like, a dog, right?
High school
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Kong
Girl reporter: So he said, ‘I hope you people fall into acid!’ Who wishes that?
Guy reporter: Wow, intense.
Girl reporter: Yeah. But the logistics — who fills the baby pool with acid?
Guy reporter: The terminator fell into acid in T2.
Girl reporter: The Riddler… No, the Joker fell into acid.
Guy reporter: He lived though.
Girl reporter: And tried to kill Batman. So, see? People falling into acid works out badly for the rest of us.
500 West Jefferson Street
Monroe, North Carolina
