Worker: I need you to pick up one of my kids, since you're already out there.
Peon: Why? What happened?
Worker: She missed the bus…again. Oh, wait, it gets better. It was the short bus. How do you miss the freaking short bus? It waits for you! The cherry on top of the sundae is that this is the second time it's happened.
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
CSR #1: Don’t make fun of me, but where is San Francisco?
CSR #2, laughing: What? Are you serious? We have an office there!
CSR #1: I said don’t make fun of me!
CSR #2: California, Lisa*. It’s in California.
Fishers, Indiana
Overheard by: Geography is not her best subject
Cheery coworker on Thursday: Thank god it's Friday!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
ERT member: Sir, you need to exit the building for the evacuation drill.
Employee re-entering building: I’m emotionally distraught. I can’t participate.
Midwest
IT: If we’re going to upgrade, what would be the difference between versions 7.1 and 6.5?
Manager: .6
5301 Bolsa Avenue
Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: Adam Westrich
Admin #1: So like, what exactly is the big deal about Einstein anyway?
Admin #2: Uh, how about the Theory of Relativity?
Admin #1: Yeah, I know but like, what else?
University of Idaho
709 Deakin Avenue
Moscow, Idaho
Overheard by: infidel
Doctor #1: So I called him when he didn’t show up for his visit and told him I was waiting for him. He told me that he came, signed in, filled out the insurance paperwork, answered some questions, then left and went home.
Doctor #2: What an idiot. Don’t people realize that when you have a doctor’s appointment, you’re actually supposed to go in to see the doctor?
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Moron
Conference attendee: Ooh…red flashy reflector buttons. What do they do
Conference employee: Well, they flash and reflect.
Conference attendee: Well I’ll take one. My son will love it. Does it have a name?
Conference employee: How about a red flashy reflector button?
500 E. Cesar Chavez Street
Austin, Texas
CSR: Time is going sooo slow…
Manager: Dude, I have a great idea.
CSR: Dude, what is it?
Manager: I'll tell you later, dude.
CSR: How much later, dude?
Manager: Like 30 minutes.
CSR: Dude, that's like 45 minutes away! (bangs head on desk)
Austin, Texas
Legal assistant #1: My new butter dish is made from crystal.
Legal assistant #2: Crystal, like? from under the sea?
Toronto
Canadia
