Very calm guy in kitchen: And then, after that, I became a waterspout.
Toledo, Ohio
Very calm guy in kitchen: And then, after that, I became a waterspout.
Toledo, Ohio
Employee: It's scary when your own government is telling you that the unemployment rate will raise and economy will worsen.
Friend: Hmm. Debatable.
Employee: It's like your parents telling you that you're going to be a junkie in the coming year.
Piscataway, New Jersey
Overheard by: Caroline
Lady #1: Yeah, so I saw Evie* over at the courthouse, and she yells at me, ‘Yo, girl, you wearin’ panties?’ And so I say back, ‘Yeah, I sho’ am!’ Her mother gets right up and tells me she ain’t wearin’ any panties.
Lady #2: Haha. Why she at court?
Lady #1: Some probation thing.
1340 Forest Avenue
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: Reggie Queen
Frat boy to another who is wiping something off his shoe: At least you stepped in dog shit!
Walking into Bobby Bowden Stadium in Tallahassee for FSU/NC State football game.
Girl: Did you go to sleep right away or were there bedtime activities?
Boy: No, we did not have sex because I was so full of pie!
The Loop
Chicago, Illinois
Bus boy #1: I went to the new hostess’s MySpace page.
Bus boy #2: The little mousey girl?
Bus boy #1: Turns out she’s bi. Got a picture on there of her getting nailed from behind by another chick with a strap-on.
Bus boy #2: God, if my mom would let me, I would marry her!
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Old lady #1: One time I had a pearl necklace, and part fell down my bra.
Old lady #2: I hate when that happens.
Old lady #1: I had to reach in there and scoop it out.
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Employee friend: So, is everybody getting laid off then?
Executive friend: Not everybody.
(employee friend smiles)
Executive friend: Just everybody that wasn't on the commonwealth* project.
Employee friend: I wasn't on the commonwealth project.
Executive friend: Oh, yeah, uh…
Beacon Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I WAS on the Project!!!
Lady #1: I thought he was going to be a priest…
Lady #2: No, he got thrown out for coming home drunk from a strip club!
Boston, Massachusetts
Office worker on phone to friend: No, go ahead and ask the question–I can think and work at the same time.
Jeanerette, Louisiana
