Coworker #1: I feel like going down to Grand Central and hanging out.
Coworker #2: There is a name for people like that.
Coworker #1: What’s that.
Coworker #2: “Hooker.”
Port Chester, New York
HR girl #1: Did you hear? Mike* is dating a 17 year old. In high school!
HR girl #2: How old is he?
HR girl #3: 24! That's not right. I used to have respect for him because he works with cancer patients, but I don't anymore.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Daniel
Older saleswoman, picking up the phone: Hello, this is Sue. How may I help you? Yes? Oh, no! Oh, dear! Definitely! Absolutely, just bring it on in and I’ll take care of it for you. No problem! I’m soooo sorry. I am so, so, so sorry!! [Hangs up phone.] I’m sorry your mother was a prostitute.
Department Store
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: lisa
Librarian #1: He's getting married in September. I guess it's pretty serious.
Office worker: Of course it's serious if they're getting married!
Librarian #2: Well, he could be forced into it. Maybe it's an arranged marriage!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Paralegal: I fell in love with Edward. It killed me that he left Bella. Killed me.
Austin, Texas
Coworker to another: Better. I like it. When I see wood, it's a good thing.
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Someone finally cleaned off their desk
Supervisor signing box, dreamily: Ah! I love packages…
Chino, California
Overheard by: Emu Whisperer
Male coworker: That smells good, what is it?
Female coworker: Air freshener… and a fart.
Nashville, Tennessee
(coworker #2 has just returned from a two-hour meeting)
Coworker #1: How was the meeting?
Coworker #2: My hemorrhoids are okay until we get to the 1:45 mark. Then I get that itchy twitchy feeling.
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Lola
Reporter: I wasn't drinking because I was depressed; I was partying so I could feel young.
Mesa, Arizona
