Old lady #1: Tea bag? I can't get the teabag to work.
Old lady #2: Why not? It's not like you're bothering anyone.
Old lady #1: Well, I'd have to lay down and my face might get wet from the teabag.
Old lady #2: Yeah, you don't want teabag juice gettin' all over your face.
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Coworker #1: Hey, want to go outside to smoke?
Coworker #2: Yeah, I need to hit the can first.
Coworker #1: I already went.
Coworker #2: That wasn't an invitation.
Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia
Female coworker, about male coworker: He let me spray him before!
Raleigh, North Carolina
Coworker on phone: “C” as in “telephone”? Oh, “a” as in “telephone”…
Grandview, Ohio
Overheard by: Ty
Coworker: Did she come?
Secretary: Oh yeah.
Coworker: Wow, that was fast!
Secretary: Yup, in and out!
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Ian
Female coworker: My box is just exploding right now!
Bellevue, Washington
Coworker #1: We need printing guidelines for clients.
Coworker #2: I don't care what they print on: Mylar, Duratran, paper-machete…
Kenilworth, New Jersey
Overheard by: Scared Employee
Coworker #1, seeing coworker #2 bring a plate of food: Don't expect this all the time. By the way, thanks for breakfast this morning.
Coworker #2: See? It's quid faux crow!
Coworker #1: Umm… No. It's not.
Leawood, Kansas
Overheard by: The Grammar Nazi
Chubby worker to young girl: Your hat is so cute! My niece would love it. Where did you get it?
Young girl in beaded hat: Limited Too!
Chubby worker, after girl has left: I don't have a niece. I will have that hat!
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts
Coworker: Where's Qatar?
Office assistant in early twenties: The Middle East. It's where we were in Desert Storm.
Whole office: Oh, you were in Desert Storm?
Office assistant in early twenties: No no no no! I mean “we” as in… like… America.
New Haven, Connecticut
Overheard by: nick T.
