Outraged peon, about Phil Hughes: This kid is 21 years old! Twenty-one! What were you doing at 21? Going to class? Drinking beer? This kid has the most important job in the world… and he is only 21!
Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Feeling bad for others
Coworker, to overly bright and happy coworker at 8 am: You need a root canal.
Dalton, Georgia
Air hostess to another: No, I would not have sex with an elf.
Raleigh, North Carolina
Coworker to another: If your balls were full of oxygen and my wife were drowning, she'd rather die than suck on your balls.
Durham, North Carolina
Woman #1: Sometimes I like doing jobs like this.
Woman #2: Like what?
Woman #1: You know, mindless hand jobs.
380 Lafayette Road East
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: Krista
Coworker #1: Yeah, Sue* and I were in the middle of a big drug deal this morning.
Coworker #2: Nice! I walked through a prostitution ring on my way here.
2110 Western Avenue
Seattle, Washington
Coworker #1: So, if I bought a bottle of vodka…
Coworker #2: It's 9:25 am.
Manhattan, New York
Sales manager: So as of our next issue, the logo will no longer be purple.
Rep: How come?
Sales manager: Because purple is associated with homosexuals.
Rep: I thought rainbow colors were the gay color tip-off?
Sales manager: No, it’s purple. And I know that’s true because that’s what they paint their front doors.
Rep: I have never heard that. Why would they do that?
Sales manager: So they can identify themselves to each other.
Rep: Oh, I get it. So when they’re driving around the city they can say, “Oh look, Dwayne, a purple door! Let’s stop in and get some decorating tips!”
600 East Main Street
Louisville, KY
Female office worker #1, about anal sex: I've never had a guy even try… I wonder if it's because of us, or the guys we date?
Female office worker #2: I don't think it's me. It must be the guys. You go for the “sensitive type.”
Female office worker #1: Yeah … and you go for douchebags.
Commonwealth Ave
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Oh Dear
Coworker #1: With all the rain we've been getting, I bet the streams are running full.
Coworker #2: That depends on how much beaver action there's been. (pause) Did I seriously just say that?
Colchester, Vermont
Overheard by: hddesc
