Coworker #1 to coworkers #2 and #3, about their attire: You guys are opposites today. Actually, you cancel each other out. You're, like, invisible! (looks around) Wh… Wh… Where'd they go?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: what a spectacle…
Coworker #1 to coworkers #2 and #3, about their attire: You guys are opposites today. Actually, you cancel each other out. You're, like, invisible! (looks around) Wh… Wh… Where'd they go?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: what a spectacle…
Worker bee: Sorry, I got my lesbian juices all over it.
200 West 7th Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Phone Slave
Liberal cube dweller #1: I have so much to celebrate next week. My sister's birthday and the anniversary of Roe v. Wade.
Liberal cube dweller #2: You celebrate that?
Liberal cube dweller #1: Yes, I absolutely do.
Liberal cube dweller #2: What kind of cake do you get?
Liberal cube dweller #1: A fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #2: I have seen the fetus cookies, but I have never seen a fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #1: I'm kidding. Not about celebrating Roe v. Wade, but about having a fetus cake.
Liberal cube dweller #2: I'd eat a fetus cake.
Albany, New York
Overheard by: We are NOT Reception
Worker #1: Did you vote?
Worker #2: I can’t vote.
Worker #1: Why not?
Worker #2: I’m not a citizen.
Worker #1: You’re from here, no?
Worker #2: No, I’m from Canada.
Worker #1: Oh… You don’t look like a Canadian.
45 Rockefeller Center
New York, New York
Front office lady #1: “Abraham begot Isaac.” What does that mean?
Front office lady #2: It means Abraham is Isaac’s father -he had Isaac. It’s like “Adam knew Eve.” That means Adam banged her.
Front office lady #1: I don’t think you can say that.
Medical Office
Lincoln, Nebraska
Worker #1: Is anyone else in here cold?
Worker #2: Well I'm not warm…If that's what you mean.
Renton, Washington
Staffer #1: Hey, Gary*, do you have a spoon?
Staffer #2: What kind of spoon?
Staffer #1: Um, one to eat liquids with… What other kinds of spoons are there?
Staffer #2: Well, jeez — there’s fishing spoons, crack spoons, and cuddling positions.
Staffer #1: You’re the only person I know who would ever think of those kinds of spoons over a soup spoon.
Waterfront
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Fork and Knife
Office worker #1: Do we need to talk about how to handle a psychiatric emergency with her?
Office worker #2: If it happens, I'm shutting my door on her crazy ass.
Atlanta, Georgia
Cube dweller #1 to cube dweller #3: Why are you eating Fritos?
Cube dweller #2: Well, everybody needs a good Lay.
Cube dweller #3: I could have two or three right in a row.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
