Very Nerdy Gay Porno? Discuss.

Gay IT guy: Man, it's hot in here.
Coworker: Yeah, especially since you walked in, but we have the heater on.

Appleton City, Missouri

Posted on August 12, 2020
Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Gays and lesbians, Missouri, Sexuality, Tech People, Weather

It’s My Fitness Program

Female co-worker: Yeah, these bruises on my legs? I wish I could say they were from S&M. Actually, I was just drunkenly stumbling around.

33 New Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: McN

Posted on August 11, 2020
Bimbettes, California, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Sexuality, Substance Use & Abuse

And Really, How Many Impalements Are You Gonna Do in a Year?

Loud coworker on phone: Well, there you go! … Except that they’re not metal spikes anymore, that’s not a bad idea.

50 Millstone Road
East Windsor, New Jersey

Overheard by: Wondering what they turned into

Posted on August 8, 2020
Compliments, Coworkers, New Jersey, On the phone

They Say Pets Resemble Their Owners… (We're Just Saying)

Office lady #1: I need to take my cat to the vet.
Office lady #2: Why?
Office lady #1: There's something wrong with his nipples. It's like he has boobs on his belly.

St. Paul, Minnesota

Overheard by: choked on my energy drink

Posted on August 5, 2020
Animals, Body Parts, Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Minnesota

…Unless That's the Landscaping Look You're Going for

Coworker on phone: No, you can't let Stan do that! If he uses that bulldozer in your yard it'll look like some blind guy with his head between his ass.

Columbia, New Jersey

Posted on August 4, 2020
Advice, Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, New Jersey, On the phone

Best. County Fair. Ever.

Coworker: It's like looking at livestock. Bull walks by? Oh, it's a bull. Cow walks by? Oh, it's a cow. Lady Gaga walks by? Oh, it's Lady Gaga without her pants again!

Australia

Posted on August 3, 2020
Animals, Australia, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Music

If I Can't Buy a Blouse There, It Doesn't Exist for Me.

Female worker #1: I told my customer we should be anthropologists. Do you know what anthropology is?
Female worker #2: You mean like the store?
Female worker #1: No, that's “Anthropologie” with an “i.”
Female worker #2. Then no.

Portland, Oregon

Posted on August 1, 2020
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Questions, Words

If They're Not Civil, You Can Fire Them

Office dweller #1: What is a civil servant?
Office dweller #2: Like someone that serves you in your house, like a butler.
Office dweller #1: Oh, I thought it was like a post office worker or something.
Office dweller #2: Nope, pretty sure it's a butler.

Cube world, San Diego

Overheard by: Tired of the nonsense