CSR to friend: So apparently my lymphedema makes me more likely to get cancer in the future…
Boss, interrupting: That's a relief. Not that I'd wish cancer on you. More the fact that you're more likely to get it than me. I like that sort of news. We need more of that around here! (walks off).
CSR's friend: Here's HR's number.
Newcastle
England
Overheard by: Trying to hide
Coworker at bar: Shit, a degree doesn't mean anything! I'm dumber than a box of rocks and I have a degree!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Assistant: I heard you told someone in the office that we're all on medication here. I take offense to that. I'm not on medication.
Boss: You should be. It gets you through the day so much easier.
Connecticut
Excited colleague: … So it came out like diarrhea!
452 5th Avenue
New York, New York
Female coworker: I'm about half tired of people calling me “sir” on the phone. Do I sound that much like a man?
Male coworker: You don't sound like a man, you sound like a drag queen.
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: bigcutebeachgirl
Female coworker to another: I thought I was having a miscarriage when you called last night. Or it might have been just bad tacos.
McAlen, Texas
20-something girl: I hate coming here, it's always cold and my nipples get hard.
20-something friend: That never happens to me… Is that like getting a hard-on or something?
Resort and Casino
Ledyard, Connecticut
Overheard by: fxwd
Employee #1, walking into kitchen: Oh look, it's the two people in this office I hate the most.
Employee #2: Good, I think you should get upset and leave.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: tbomb
Coworker: Hey, do you remember how big his package was?
Boston, Massachusetts
Male coworker #1: Well, we played with it enough, it's not hanging out as much.
Male supervisor: Yeah, if you beat on it enough, eventually these things go in.
(uncomfortable silence)
Male supervisor: Do you think I could go see it?
Male coworker #2: Yeah, just make sure you don't pull on it!
Richland, Washington
Overheard by: I think they were talking about a server…
