Grunt: Man, this consultant is absurdly high maintenance. I swear, the woman’s going to ask for a pony next!
Boss: Just get her what she wants. We need her on-board.
Grunt: Well, if she gets a pony, I want one, too.
Washington, DC
Grunt: Man, this consultant is absurdly high maintenance. I swear, the woman’s going to ask for a pony next!
Boss: Just get her what she wants. We need her on-board.
Grunt: Well, if she gets a pony, I want one, too.
Washington, DC
Regional Director: I’m so sorry you had to wait, I was on the phone then my assistant got me off. Did she offer you anything?
2800 Post Oak Boulevard
Houston, Texas
Male manager to female assistant carrying two cups of coffee: Double fisting? … Wow, sorry. I’m sorry.
175 5th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Emily
Lower-middle management: I know you're having lunch, but I'm trying to get this done by the end of the day…
Borderline wage-slave: Sure! And you don't care who gets trampled in your little march to “progress”!
Lower-middle management: Um, I'll come back later then…
Borderline wage-slave (cheerfully): Okay! See you later!
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Carver Stone
Designer: You shot the Rubik’s Cube contest?
Photographer: Yeah. It was like watching fat, naked men greased up in butter sumo wrestling. You don’t want to watch, but you can’t look away.
Designer: … You know, most people use the metaphor, ‘It was like watching a train wreck,’ but you took it to a really dark place.
323 E Grand River Avenue
Howell, Michigan
Overheard by: Dundie
Associate: Hey, can you come look at my pooter?
Manager: Your what?
Associate: What? … What? Come on, my computer!
Mass Street
Lawrence, Kansas
Overheard by: tara
Laughing boss: Look, you guys, you can’t be talking about anal sex — we’ve had some complaints.
Server #1, laughing: I knew it! I knew she would tell on us. I told you Deb* was out to get us!
Server #2: Sooo, just when she’s not around, or at all?
Laughing boss: I can’t believe I have to say this…
Dining room, upscale retirement center
Bloomington, Illinois
BIG bigwig: I had a tunafish sandwich for lunch and all I can smell is tuna. Come here; smell me. Do I smell like tuna?
Smallwig: Nope. I know how you feel though. It just stays with you. Tuna definitely lingers.
Florida State University
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: so hard not to giggle
Director: My weekend sucked… How was yours?
Minion: Great! I woke up Saturday morning with peanut butter on my face. Still can't figure that one out.
Boss, laughing: Did you have patches of hair missing too? I've heard that's bad.
Minion: No, that was my dog.
Lenexa, Kansas
Overheard by: I don't want to work with here anymore
Controller to president: I’m ready, baby, what do you wanna do? You wanna do it in my office? C’mon baby, what do you wanna do?
President: I want for you not to touch me with your viral infections.
150 Batson Drive
Manchester, Connecticut
