Female marketing executive to male sales executive: Well, you can just suck my imaginary dick!
Research Boulevard
Rockville, Maryland
Female marketing executive to male sales executive: Well, you can just suck my imaginary dick!
Research Boulevard
Rockville, Maryland
Coworker: Remember that one guy that we interviewed that wouldn't stop staring at Rachel*'s tits?
Madison, Wisconsin
Loud office chick: You're growing new bones in your body! You have to drink milk!
Hudson Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Coworker: His problem is that he has two perfectly good legs attached to an asshole. He needs to have his legs removed so he can be a whole asshole.
Manchester, Connecticut
Overheard by: very amused
Supervisor to art director, while playing with digital camera: I am also deleting these photos, well–they should have been deleted a long time ago–but those ones of me on my knees.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Advisor on phone: Since I'm not there anymore, you need to let the whole office know about that little victory! If nothing else…just so that I can toot my horn through your mouth!
El Paso, Texas
Overheard by: Band Nerd
Lawyer to another: Just so you know, I'm going to make a concerted effort to quit picking my nose.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jeeb
Boss: If the phone rings, and I'm still here…
Secretary: You're not here?
Boss: Right. I don't care if it's Carmen Electra calling for an emergency titty-fuck.
Rhode Island
Overheard by: Lauren
Executive director: Yeah, I liked that candidate.
Director: Yeah, me too.
Executive director: But she seems to me like she could be a potential serial killer, you know? It was just something about her eyes.
Madison Ave
New York City, New York
Coworker, ranting about the office copier: Guess what I have to do in five minutes. Get a “training” session on the 250 from Bob. Yeah, I know. If the 250 were a person, I would be its gynecologist, I know it so well! I have been into its regions and back, retrieving jammed paper!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Living for Friday
