Two– I Only Count the Happy Years

Coworker #1: So what are you doing this weekend?
Coworker #2: My wife and I are celebrating our 23rd anniversary.
Coworker #1: So how long have you guys been married?

Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: huh?

Posted on April 29, 2015
Age and ageing, Arizona, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Questions

That's What My Gyno Calls It!

Paul: When did you lose your virginity?
Mike: Well, I was sixteen. But I touched my first vagina when I was six.
Paul: What?
Mike: Yeah. We were playing a game I like to call, “Dr. Pokey Fingers.”

Stamford, Connecticut

Posted on April 26, 2015
Age and ageing, Body Parts, Connecticut, Friends, Names, Questions, Sexuality

But It Reads at a 40-Year-Old's Level

Office lady, answering about her age: A lady never tells. My box is 30-35.

Brooklyn, New York

Overheard by: casayoto

Posted on April 14, 2015
Age and ageing, Body Parts, Education, Employees, New York, Sexuality

Thanks, Law & Order: SVU!

Guy at lunch table: Now I know how to get into little kids' mouths.

Chicago, Illinois

Posted on April 7, 2015
Age and ageing, Body Parts, Employees, Illinois, Out to Lunch, Weirdness

Sometimes Guys Like a Little Extra Friction

Director, pointing to picture: This sister? Is she older than you?
Employee: No I’m the oldest.
Director: She looks older than you. Both your sisters do.
Employee: That’s because they both stopped taking their estrogen. They dried up.

365 W Passaic St,
Rochelle Park, New Jersey

Overheard by: Cubicle right outside

Posted on March 31, 2015
Age and ageing, Bosses and Underlings, Family, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Physical Appearance, Questions

Then You’d Need to Raise Money for Broken Hips

Girl #1: Hey, do you want to do the Ann Landers 5k with me?
Girl #2: Ann Landers has her own 5k?
Girl #1: Yeah, it’s to raise money for whatever she died of.
Girl #2: I thought she just died of being old. Wouldn’t it be awesome if there was a 5k to raise money to prevent old?

835 N. Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on March 27, 2015
Age and ageing, Friends, Health & Hygiene, Illinois, Money, Questions, Sports

When Bill Clinton Dreams

Employee in back room of shop: That chubby little boy who used to walk past my house every day is now a stripper!

Mount Vernon, Washington

Overheard by: HeatherC

Posted on March 24, 2015
Age and ageing, Employees, Physical Appearance, Washington, Weirdness

Baby Hercules Surprised Everybody

Man on cell: He put you into a headlock and gave you a noogie? (pause) You realize our son is eight months old? (pause) Okay, almost nine months but still he can barely move his fingers, let alone put you into a headlock.

Founders Plaza
East Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Bamber