Receptionist: Give me an STD that's not serious, just…unhealthy.
London
England
Receptionist: Give me an STD that's not serious, just…unhealthy.
London
England
Coworker, talking about spam filter: I used to get penis all the time, now…not so much.
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Employee helping customer with curtains: Now I'm slightly tacky, but I think you could work these…
Bed Bath & Beyond
San Francisco, California
Peon #1: So, I finally got my new car–it's a Scion.
Peon #2: Oh yeah, dude, you like?
Peon #1: Yeah, it's sweet. It's a standard.
Peon #2: Why?
Peon #1: Well, my brother only has one arm, so this way he can't borrow my car.
West Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
Office lady #1: At the bar my sister works at, they put jello shots in a syringe so you can just squeeze it back.
Office lady #2: Oh no, I like to feel it all over.
Pearl Street
Austin, Texas
Accountant on phone: And what does he want inserted there? And all the way down to the end? I don't think it will fit.
New York City, New York
Female coworker: I kinda like the idea that I once was a sperm.
Willow Lawn
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Stacy
Older Scottish woman: The poor wee lad's 21 now, but he's still got the mind of a child.
Geordie woman: Aye.
Older Scottish woman: Still doesn't stop her taking him to all the gay clubs, though.
Geordie woman: Aye.
Newcastle upon Tyne
England
Overheard by: Finance Mole
65-year-old female manager to male manager: Every time I talk to this woman it turns into a huge dick-waving contest. (pause) I think she has finally realized that I am the queen of winning dick-waving contests.
Mobile, Alabama
Overheard by: Winning this contest any day
