Arrogant attorney, in disgust: I would never do yard work. It would make me feel…poor.
Washington, DC
Arrogant attorney, in disgust: I would never do yard work. It would make me feel…poor.
Washington, DC
IT manager: What is the plan for the internal server deployment?
IT drone: We are going to the client on Monday to stand up the server.
IT manager: You promised me a plan by 5/1. Where is it?
IT drone: The plan is that we will go to the client on Monday and do the work.
IT manager: You understand, I need a plan. When can you get it to me?
Washington, DC
(young executive is talking about a presentation (aka deck) he sent to the director)
Director: You know, it just got me so excited to see a deck like that. I'm so glad. The deck actually got me almost over-excited. Now I'm going to be playing around with this deck all night.
Exec: Uh huh.
Director: It's just so stimulating .
Exec: Uh huh.
Director: I'm just fascinated by decks like that. I feel very over-excited about it.
Exec: Uh huh.
(pause)
Director: Oh, you must be getting really overheated. I should let you go. Have a good trip. I'll be thinking about your deck until you come back.
K Street
Washington, DC
Coworker: You keep hearing all this stuff about cherries being good for you. They’re actually not that good for you. It’s just what the people in northern Michigan say to get you to buy their cherries!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Librarian #1: He's getting married in September. I guess it's pretty serious.
Office worker: Of course it's serious if they're getting married!
Librarian #2: Well, he could be forced into it. Maybe it's an arranged marriage!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Boss: So see if you can find these people’s email addresses.
Intern: …You want me to find Desmond Tutu’s email address?
Boss: Try Google if you get stumped.
2130 H Street NW
Washington, DC
Boss to employee: So, will you be my secret agent in the ladies’ bathroom?
13th Street and F Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: wiretapper
Co-Worker #1: Hey, I got a new joke. Anyone want to hear it?
Co-Worker #2: Not if it involves poop.
Co-Worker #3: Or chickens.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: disturbed
Cashier to customer #1: Awww, how cute! Is he your son?
Customer #2: No, he’s my son.
Cashier, pointing to customer #1: Are you sure? He looks like his son!
Government building
Washington, DC
Female cube dweller, to no one in particular: The grapes in the cafeteria are going soft on me.
Washington, DC
