Client on phone: When can I schedule an appointment to conjugate a meeting?
315 North Great Neck Road
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Client on phone: When can I schedule an appointment to conjugate a meeting?
315 North Great Neck Road
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Coworker on phone: Hi! Yes, I'm am looking for deer carcasses. I was hoping you can help me find some roadkill deer carcasses.
Virginia
Boss on phone: Hey, uh, I booked a vacation with you guys and pre-paid and everything, and uh, well, (pause) I don't really know how to say this, but uh, I did some things… You know, uh-uh-uh, things you do when you are on vacation, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh… and… uh, well I overslept and missed my flight back home, so I had to buy another airline ticket and want to know if I can get some of my money back.
Richmond, Virginia
Boss: Yeah, I have to have another colonoscopy in a couple months.
Employee: That sounds unpleasant.
Boss: Mmm-hm — colonoscopy, the ultimate home movie.
Tysons Corner, Virginia
College girl #1: I was talking with my dad about it over break, and he said I really shouldn’t worry about it because 90 percent of women get married. But if you think about it, that really isn’t a lot. I mean, what if I’m part of that 10 percent?
College girl #2: Well, that probably includes lesbians, though.
College girl #1: Yeah! That’s right! And disabled people!
Whitehead Road
Charlottesville, Virginia
Overheard by: Did she really say that?
Employee #1, about former boss: Why is her Facebook picture a bird?
Employee #2: She loved birds. She has a cajillion of them. When she worked here there was bird shit everywhere. There are still some remnants.
Falls Church, Virginia
Overheard by: My desk has a window
Assistant to receptionist: Remember that phone call you transferred to me earlier? The guy you thought was drunk? Turned out he was just Canadian.
Reston, Virginia
Serious boss: Tom*, we need to discuss the appropriate use of inflatable novelties at the beach.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Last day at work
Male co-worker on phone: So my toe is definitely broken. No jogging for at least four weeks. So, you wanna come over tonight? If I can’t run, then at least I can fuck my way to fitness.
Fairfax, Virginia
Boss: What about those materials needing to be sent out to our components?
Co-worker: Oh, I threw them in a box and shoved it under my chair. They were taking up too much room on my desk.
5205 Leesburg Pike
Falls Church, Virginia