Cube chick: You should go in Jeff’s office -it is so cold in there you could hang meat.
Cube dude: I hang meat everywhere I go.
Dallas, Texas
Cube chick: You should go in Jeff’s office -it is so cold in there you could hang meat.
Cube dude: I hang meat everywhere I go.
Dallas, Texas
Mental patient #1: I like oxygen.
Mental patient #2: Me too.
Mental patient #1: Do you have any M&Ms?
Mental patient #2: No, do you?
Mental patient #1: No. I just thought I'd ask.
Wichita Falls, Texas
Overheard by: I love my job
Functionally retarded janitor: This job really needs some strippers.
Engineer: You could get a night job at a strip club.
Functionally retarded janitor: But those places fire you when you try to touch the girls.
Senlac Drive
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: This Company Needs to Do Better Background Checks
Mother: Tell your aunt what you want to be when you grow up.
2-Year-Old son: A plastic surgeon!
Mother: And why is that?
2-Year-Old son: Because Mommy needs work!
Miss Saigon Café
Hurst, Texas
Overheard by: needo
Coworker: I should ask Mary if I could trade my pink one for her white one.
Richardson, Texas
Office worker #1: But we don't have any hard data for that.
Office worker #2: Don't worry, we'll just make up some numbers for the presentation.
Plano, Texas
Boss on phone: It needs to be beef, not candy.
Victoria, Texas
Overheard by: Diana
Coworker: Hey, does anyone have a dollar that I could borrow for an hour?
Houston, Texas
Worker #1: Can you sign Louise's birthday card?
Worker #2 (reading card): You know, “decapitated” is one of those words that never looks like it's spelled right.
Chevy Chase Building
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Xen
Guy on cell: You have to pull the door and then turn the key. (pause) Did the key break off in the lock? (pause) Look at your key. Is half of it missing?
West Jefferson
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Kazmeyer
