Texas

Editor #1: Should we tell the author we lost that whole section of the manuscript?
Editor #2: No, let’s not announce that we’re incompetent.
Editor #1: Yeah, let’s let it be a surprise.

8700 Shoal Creek Boulevard
Austin, Texas

Project manager: Thanks, [Craig].
Art director: You mean [Jose]? He’s [Craig].
Project manager: I mean [Jose]. Sorry, I got you mixed up since you’re both wearing yellow shirts.
Art director: My shirt isn’t yellow. Neither is [Craig’s].

6501 Legacy Drive
Plano, Texas

Manager: Does anyone have a vanilla folder?
Underling: A what?
Manager: A vanilla folder?
Underling: A what?
Manager: A vuh-nil-uh folder!
Underling: Sorry, I only have chocolate.

508 Carroll Street
Fort Worth, Texas

Manager: You could sit in my office since I am dialed in, but I just got over the crud so maybe that is not such a good idea. Why don;t you go down to the Alpha Room?…No, scratch that. Those guys went
to Taco Bueno for lunch and I am not sure that is such a good idea. Maybe you just better dial in from your office.

730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas

Tech: You can’t save with Adobe Reader. You have to have Professional to save what you enter in the form.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: Yes, but in Reader. You have to have Professional.
Sales Assistant: So I can’t save?
Tech: Right.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: That doesn’t matter. You still can’t save the form.
Sales Assistant: But I have 6.0.
Tech: In Reader. You have to have Professional to save the data you enter in the form. Reader won’t let you save changes to a PDF.
Sales Assistant: Okay. But I have 6.0. Why can’t I save with that?

12100 I-40 East
Amarillo, Texas

Receptionist: Hey everyone, tomorrow the building management is changing the bathrooms codes to 6-1-5.
Co-worker #1: But…we don’t have a 6.
Co-worker #2: Yeah, the buttons only go up to 5.
Co-worker #1: Is the building management trying to tell us we’re not allowed to pee any more?

2425 West Loop South
Houston, Texas

HR: You miscoded your timesheets as vacation instead of holiday.
Employee: What difference does it make? It’s a day off. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: The difference is that it put you over on your vacation time for the year.
Employee: But it was a holiday. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: Do you know how many days off you have per year?
Employee: Yes, but holiday/vacation, it’s all a day off.
HR: Tell that to the employee that just got let go for miscoding time.
Employee: …I’ll fix it.

4400 Post Oak Parkway
Houston, Texas

Receptionist on speaker: I’m sorry. [Chris] is still on the phone. Would you like his voicemail?
Customer: No. I am afraid he won’t call back, and this is an emergency.
Receptionist: I can put you on hold again. But he has had a lot of calls today, and I don’t know how long it will be before you can speak to him.
Customer: I would like to kick his butt.
Receptionist: I’m sorry. You will have to stand in line to do that.

5711 East FM-40
Lubbock, Texas

Manager: Good morning ladies. What are you whispering about?
Secretary #1 & #2: You.

11909 Spencer Road
Houston, Texas

Originator: Two charts are just great. Very helpful. Two is a lot more
than one.
VP: Yeah, it’s like twice as much.

910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas