Associate to IT guy: So, my touchscreen hasn't been working, so I hit it harder and now there's a crack in the screen.
IT guy: Your computer isn't touchscreen.
Schaumburg, Illinois
Overheard by: Get me out of here
Associate to IT guy: So, my touchscreen hasn't been working, so I hit it harder and now there's a crack in the screen.
IT guy: Your computer isn't touchscreen.
Schaumburg, Illinois
Overheard by: Get me out of here
Tech support rep: Okay, so go ahead and type in the url in the address bar.
Customer: Okay, uh, um, should I be on the internet?
Tech support rep: Yes.
Customer: Okay. Um. Okay. So uh, should I google “internet”?
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: loves three way calling and the mute button
Analyst #1: Yeah, I have a meeting with him tomorrow.
Analyst #2: Is he going to give you the golden shower?
Boston, Massachusetts
Tech rep to customer: I'm sorry, sir, we don't have any little balls to send out.
Allentown, Pennsylvania
IT guy: Oh my god, I had such a terrible dream last night.
Receptionist: Yeah? What happened?
IT guy: I had a penis growing out of the back of my head.
Receptionist: Oh, um… Oh, wow!
IT guy: I know, right? And the worst part is I had to wear hoodies!
Woodinville, Washington
Overheard by: How is that the worst part?!
Analyst #1: I have a whole case of water in my car.
Analyst #2: Hoe cakes?
Sugar Land, Texas
Overheard by: Say What?
Tech on intercom: Who stole Frank's sword?
Coworker down the hall: Frank's sword is covered in latex!
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Vinana
Manager: Does anyone know anything about the new shift schedule?
Analyst: Karla tried to explain the new shift to me…then it got black…and I don't remember much…but then I woke up sucking my thumb and calling for my mom.
Redmond, Washington
Overheard by: Amy
Beautiful supervisor on phone: How did that project I gave you go?
Tech support specialist: Well, I ran into a couple of…snatches.
Beautiful supervisor: Okay, well, I will come help you out.
Tech support specialist, hanging up phone: I meant to say “glitches,” I meant to say “glitches”!
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Tech Anthony
Programmer: So I'm beginning to think that [client's name] is a huge fuckup.
Boss: Yeah, but he fucks up with style. He's the Buzz Lightyear of fuckups.
Mesa, Arizona
Overheard by: Chris Cardinal
