10AM Find Out What’s Wrong with the Janitor

IT Guy #1: Why didn’t the janitor take my empty computer boxes?
IT Guy #2: Did you put a sign on it for the guy to haul it away?
IT Guy #1: Yeah, it says “junk”.
IT Guy #2: Dude, it should say “trash”.

500 Eldorado Boulevard
Broomfield, Colorado

Posted on July 17, 2014
Colorado, General Idiocy, Gripes, Tech People

It Depends on the Location of His Mouth

IT guy: Here, can you hold the microphone while he talks?
Account Manager: Sure. But can you tell me, what’s the sensitive part here? Is it just the tip? Or the whole head?

155 N. Pfingsten Road
Deerfield, Illinois

Posted on July 14, 2014
Bosses, General Idiocy, Illinois, Offers and requests, Questions, Sexuality, Tech People, Words

We’re Not As Stupid As You IT A-holes Think…

IT guy: Do you have a license to install Photoshop?
Employee: You need a license?
IT guy: Yeah.
Employee: It’s not that hard to install, you just double click on the icon.
IT guy: You don’t understand.
Employee: Yeah I do, I’m just fucking with you. Jokes are funny.

2 W. 2nd Street
Tulsa, Oklahoma

Posted on July 9, 2014
Comebacks, Employees, General Idiocy, Oklahoma, Questions, Tech People, Technology

Clarity: Impossible to Apply to a Business Context

IT Consultant: It’s kinda like grain is to bread as meat is to wurst.

Highway 280
East Birmingham, Alabama

Posted on July 8, 2014
Alabama, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks, Tech People

Only If You’re A Cosby

Tester: Maybe LA can also help test sound for me.
Co-worker: …and update my test suites…and knit me sweaters.
Tester: Now that’s not exactly company related.
Co-worker: Sweaters are great company.

209 Redwood Shores Parkway
Redwood City, California

Posted on July 7, 2014
California, General Idiocy, Tech People, Technology

I Try Never to Talk to Her

Help desk manager: Hey, do you have that power supply for a Mac mini?
Microsoft exchange admin: What's a mini?
Hardware tech: You should ask your wife.
Help desk phone tech: Heyo!

Los Angeles, California