Things Heat Up a Couple of Degrees in Wisconsin, Then Cool Off

Copywriter: So David*, did you thank your wife for the candy she gave you yesterday?
David: In more ways than one.
Proofreader: A simple “yes” would have been sufficient.

Wausau, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Why am I the one blushing?

Posted on January 31, 2021
Compare and contrast, Default, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Teachers, Wisconsin, Words, Writers and Editors

I Nodded Off During the Part About the Rain Forests

Gay drama teacher: We’re going to McDonald’s, did you want us to pick something up for you?
Hippie guitar teacher: No, I don’t eat there.
Gay drama teacher: Why, because of the movie Supersize Me?
Hippie guitar teacher: No, I stopped eating there ever since they started cutting down the rain forests to make room for more cow pastures for their meat.
Gay drama teacher: So… then, you don’t want McDonalds?

1311 E Katella Ave
Orange, California

Posted on January 21, 2021
California, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks, School, Teachers

But They Still Look 17, and That Makes All the Difference

Teacher: You know, now that they are both 18, we can rape them, and it wouldn’t be considered statutory.

2 Stewart Place
Eastchester, New York

Overheard by: Johnnymunz

Posted on December 24, 2020
Advice, Creepsters, Crimes, New York, Teachers, Violence

And Your Porridge Is Too Hot, If You Catch My Drift

Student: This question doesn't make sense.
Professor: What do you expect? I'm not Goldilocks.
Every single student: What?
Professor: What? You're Goldilocks! You all are Goldilocks.

University of Akron, Ohio

Overheard by: All Three Bears

Posted on October 19, 2020
Default, Education, Ohio, Questions, Students, Teachers

Usually That’s a Line I Reserve for the Massage Parlor

Ethics professor: So, if Mr. Wiener, some new lawyer, imputed his conflict to the firm, you’re going to have a lot of unhappy lawyers. They’ll be like, ‘You suck, Wiener!’ … Oh, God, did I just say that?

Malibu, California

Overheard by: ktmonster

Posted on June 17, 2020
California, General Idiocy, Teachers

As in Blue-Footed, You Pervs

Kid #1: Number five is A, as in ‘asshole.’
Teacher: No, number five is B, as in…
Kid #2: Bastard!
Teacher: No, B as in ‘booby.’

High school
Tucson, Arizona

Overheard by: oh my

Posted on May 17, 2020
Arizona, Language barrier, Students, Teachers

What About Stupid People?

Training teacher: So, what are some things that you guys think are covered under the Americans with Disabilities Act?
Male teen student: Obesity?
Training teacher, with blank stare: Um, I don't think so. Anyone else?
Female teen student: How about being an old person?
Training teacher: Oooooooh boy. How about we just take a look at this slide up here…

Duane Reade Career Center
Manhattan, New York