Managing editor, on drug screening: We even test the interns. I was shocked by that. I thought everyone just assumed they were stoned all the time.
Newspaper office
Ohio
Overheard by: I didn’t get the job
Managing editor, on drug screening: We even test the interns. I was shocked by that. I thought everyone just assumed they were stoned all the time.
Newspaper office
Ohio
Overheard by: I didn’t get the job
Chain-Smoker, during heat wave: Smoking does keep you active and engaged with the heat.
750 Third Avenue
New York, New York
Mental Health Advisor: He’s crazy. He’s gone off his meds because he thinks the doctors are trying to shrink his penis.
240 Calhoun Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
Coworker to another: I don't think whipped cream is being abused, I think they're imagining it.
Ottawa
Canadia
Coworker on cell: You've spent twenty minutes telling me how hammered you've been for the last eight days, and now you're drinking Bourbon in my bed, something I've never done…
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Coworker #1: Doesn't she know that acid and track marks don't go together?
Coworker #2: But track marks do mean something, that's all she's saying.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: don't talk so loud
White coworker: Yo, last night was like a fuckin’ rap video! We had a limo and a bottle of fine-ass champagne! And then we went to the Hustler club! Oh, and I’m still wasted. When is the trial date for [technology company]?
153 Lexington Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: A. Goldstein
Manager: We’re in Gwinnett County. You need to be 10 feet from the walkway if you want to legally smoke.
Smoker #1: Like, isn’t that unfair? What if you’re a midget? Your feet would be about half the size of mine…No, seriously. Look how big my feet are! They’re like twice the size of midget feet…Oh! You mean like a ruler!
Smoker #2: Yeah, haven’t you ever heard of the metric system?
333 Research Court
Norcross, Georgia
Lawyer on phone: …No…No….They can’t take your kids away for smokin’ pot, that’s bullshit…Ha, ha, ha!
500 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Designer to owner: He wants me to design a sign for him that reads, “Caesar Inn, Crack-whores welcome by the hour.”
Owner: What? (walks away)
Miami, Florida
