Coworker #1: Go fist yourself.
Coworker #2: You love saying that. I think we should start a national campaign using that slogan!
Coworker #1: I like that idea. We just need someone who’s willing to appear on a billboard with their fist up their ass…
Both coworkers: Carl*!
Route 22 and Colonial Road
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Nathan
Worker bee #1: As soon as he was naked he started touching himself.
Worker bee #2: Oh my god!
Worker bee #1: Sometimes she touches herself… but not in a long time. Every time he’s naked he diddles himself!
New Hyde Park, New York
Male buyer: Did you take care of Tina's Johnson?
Female buyer: (blank stare)
Male buyer: Well, that didn't sound right now, did it?
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Cupcake
Female coworker: How old is your girlfriend's son?
Male coworker: 17. He sometimes sleeps in bed with her.
Female coworker: What? What?!
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Grossed Out
Coworker to office: Woo-hoo! I'm almost done with my list! Then I'm going to have a little party with myself! Um… That didn't sound good.
Seattle, Washington
Female coworker: I had to go to the chiropractor because I got sandwiched between two fat chicks.
York, Nebraska
Overheard by: Eric J Eckert
Coworker on phone: So I told my husband, “I'm not going to have sex with you anymore until you lose 30 pounds!”
Dallas, Texas
Female employee to male boss: Show me what seven inches looks like.
Kanata North
Canadia
CSR on phone with customer: Yes, ma'am, I should be able to put you down to service your area tomorrow. Okay, thank you. (hangs up)
CSR to office: Did I just say what I think I said?
Nashville, Tennessee
Employee to another who just sprayed hand sanitizer: Gah, you just sprayed your thing and it got in my mouth. (continues eating bag of nuts)
Lawton, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Jonathan
