Service

Woman yelling to husband over cell phone, with look of horror in her eyes: *Bob? Bob?!? Bob, are you crying? Are you crying, bob?!? Yes, I need stamps. 100 of them.

University Place
Stamford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Studs

Supervisor to manager: You know I’m leaving work early today, right?
Manager: That’s right… For what, again?
Supervisor: I’m getting my cat shaved.
(pause)
Supervisor: My cat… like, our pet cat. A feline.

Ambassador East Hotel
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: laughing one cubicle over

Manager: So yeah, you’ve got a bit of an accent there, are you from here?
Kinko’s guy: Yeah, I mean, no, not really, I lived in Ireland until I was 3, and my family still has a pretty heavy tongue.
Manager: REALLY? That’s fascinating! Can you speak some Irish for me?
Kinko’s guy: ‘hello’?

3374 W Tharpe Street
Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: laughed out loud and totally busted my own eavesdropping

Coworker on the phone: No, sir, I am doing everything I can… Sir, you aren’t listening… Sir, as I have already said… Sir… I’m gonna kick you in yo’ head!

40th Street and 5th Avenue
New York, New York

Overheard by: New to the company

Cube guy #1: Hey, I got that ointment you mentioned last night.
Cube guy #2: Oh yeah, did it go away?
Cube guy #1: Well, you know … It never really “goes away”.

Internet Company
Scottsdale, Arizona

Overheard by: Cube Guru

WeightWatchers at Work leader: Today our topic is going to be “Eating Out and Not Blowing It.”

Washington, DC

Overheard by: But what if I need the protein?

Deli employee #1: That sandwich needs pickles.
(deli employee #2 hangs head and stops making sandwich)
Deli employee #1: Are you crying?

Wawa
West Chester, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Rachael

Window washer #1, singing: I will survive, I will survive!
Window washer #2: Yehaw, that’s right, we will survive!
Window washer #1, singing: As long as I know how to wash I know I’ll stay alive.
Window washer #2: Stay alive! That’s the deal, yeeehaw!!

Jackson
Seattle, Washington

Receptionist on phone: It was a male chicken, 12 inches tall. It was corn-fed in Iowa and its sign was Pisces… Yeah, bone in.

Constellation
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Kaleb

Financial advisor on phone with possible client: I gave you what you needed. You have the paperwork. You see my partners’ names. Just don’t bullshit me… Stop cursing! I didn’t curse. I said bullshit, that’s not a curse.

50th and Broadway
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Stuck in this Cube