Insurance coordinator on phone: I received your mold report and just for future reference, “caulking” is not spelled “c-o-c-k-i-n-g.”
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Kanee
Insurance coordinator on phone: I received your mold report and just for future reference, “caulking” is not spelled “c-o-c-k-i-n-g.”
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Kanee
Voice on elevator emergency intercom: Hello? Hello?
Confused woman who just got on: Um…..yes?
Voice: Yes, I’m Karen* from American Express. Can I please speak with Shin Chen*?
Woman: Um…No… You just reached an elevator.
Voice: Oh! Well, thank you for using American Express. If you have any questions, please call 1-800-555-1234*. Thanks for using American Express and have a great day!
541 Willamette Street
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: the other passenger
Secretary: She said she’s having trouble with her desktop…
Manager: Her desktop or her laptop?
Secretary: Desktop.
Manager: So the one that sits on the desk, or the one that she can carry around with her?
Secretary: Yes.
Portland, Oregon
Client: I’ve talked to some of these people applying online. They’re a little scary — it’s not like they’re Menses candidates.
Portland, Oregon
Boss #1: We should really think about selling those apartments as condos.
Boss #2: Saying “condo” to a bank right now is like saying “cunt”
(stunned silence)
Boss #1: Personally, I kind of like the word “cunt.”
Meadows Road
Portland, Oregon
Boss lady: How was your weekend?
Top employee: Well, I spent Sunday morning in the hospital because…
Boss lady, interrupting: Was it because you're a cracked-out whore?
Forest Grove, Oregon
Overheard by: Jessi-ca
Intercom: Hey, how do you spell Sarah with an “h”?
Assistant: Yes.
3350 Tillamook Street
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Carrie Cole
Elevator geek: An IUD is not a weapon. It's a contraceptive.
Elevator cougar: Depends on who you ask.
Portland, Oregon
