(worker #1 opens can of Monster energy drink)
Worker #2: Wow, I can smell your monster from over here.
Knob Noster, Missouri
Overheard by: Jason
(worker #1 opens can of Monster energy drink)
Worker #2: Wow, I can smell your monster from over here.
Knob Noster, Missouri
Overheard by: Jason
Female employee, preparing for office happy hour: Do any of you have a bottle opener for the beer?
Male employee #1: He does.
Male employee #2: No, I don't.
Male employee #1: Yes you do, isn't there one on your belt buckle or key chain?
Male employee #2: Uhhh… No.
Male employee #1: Really? I'd swear that last time we did this, you took something out of your pants that did the job very well for her.
Kansas City, Missouri
Office grunt: Sometimes you get a hole in your bag and you lose your chicken.
10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri
(two coworkers at the urinals)
Coworker #1, about colleague: Man, what a pecker.
Coworker #2: Hey, quit looking!
Lebanon, Missouri
Big Wig: Look at that!
He gestures at stapled paper.
Big Wig: I got it in the same hole…I’ve been trying to get it in the same hole for twenty years!
633 Spirit Drive
Chesterfield, Missouri
Girl #1: What's the point of a jock strap?
Girl #2: To keep your junk from flapping around.
Girl #1: I thought that's what cups were for?
Girl #3: No, that's a whole other purpose. Besides, why would you want a big ol' hard thing in between your legs?
Girl #1: There's so many ways I could answer that.
Kansas City, Missouri
IT guy: I'm not sure how we can figure out what happened.
IT manager: Well, I guess the only thing you can do is grab the batch.
IT secretary, eavesdropping: I think I got in trouble for that in high school.
IT manager: For what?
IT secretary: For grabbing a batch.
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: i'm sure she did
Employee, talking to a customer on the phone: It’s great to hear a friendly face!
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: Kyle Ahrens
Associate #1: Why did you do that?
Associate #2: Do what?
Associate #1: Well, I was whistling, then you started whistling just as soon as I did.
Associate #2: When?
Associate #1: Just now. Are you trying to out-whistle me?
Associate #2: Out-what?
Associate #1: Out-whistle, out-whistle. I started to whistle, then you started doing it, only louder and faster and with some annoyingly catchy song.
Associate #2: I was just whistling.
Associate #1: Is this a competition? Are you competing with me?
Associate #2: I – ah – I don't – I don't understand what's happening.
Associate #1: You. Whistling. Stop it.
Associate #2: Ooookaaaay…
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Presidential Ass't
Tax guy, planning baby shower and creating a gag gift: Hey Laurel, I need your six nipples first thing in the morning!
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Erin
