Kansas

Physician: What can you tell me about this X-ray?
Student: It’s a male pelvis with two fractures.
Physician: It’s shaped like a male pelvis, but it’s not.
Student: How can you tell?
Physician: The lack of a penis outline on the X-ray helps.

Emergency Room, University of Kansas Hospital
Kansas City, Kansas

Overheard by: Stifling the Laugh

Male office worker: Come on! Smell my neck, my cologne is amazing!
Female office worker: I can't. My nose is stuffed and I can't smell anything.
Male office worker: That's no problem. I'll still be able to penetrate!

Topeka, Kansas

Boss on phone walking around office: Look, what you’re needing is something more powerful. You should try Viagra.

Overland Park, Kansas

Boss: Me and my wife would drive a hundred miles for a jar of good pickles!

10749 West 84th Terrace
Lenexa, Kansas

Overheard by: PeaveyMan

Salesman: And then you’re cruising for a bruising.
Sales manager: How old are you?
Salesman: What?
Sales manager: "Cruising for a bruising"? My grandma said that!
Salesman: How about "truckin’ for a fuckin’"?
Sales manager: OK.

111 Oak Street
Bonner Springs, Kansas

Project manager: You get me those butt connectors and we'll get back there and touch them.

Kansas City, Kansas

Supervisor, shouting to employee: Did you remember your penis?

Overland Park, Kansas

Female employee: Somebody pushed that ten-inch pepperoni way in there!

Pizza Place
Wichita, Kansas

Nurse #1: Oh my god, what’s wrong with your face?!
Nurse #2: Um… Nothing.
Nurse #1: … Oh.

Kansas

Overheard by: Princess Consuela Banana Hammock

Sales manager: You know, they just don't have that old-time VD anymore. Now it just kills you or, makes your dick explode.

Bonner Springs, Kansas